fAiZaLcOoL

2009-09-16T05:12:00.002+08:00

I miss zaman The-Exo. I miss Fizykal & Co. I miss last year's Surfers. Hmm...Can we have it back?? I wonder..

2009-09-13T23:06:00.000+08:00

2009 just sucks for me. Period. If only I could run away to other countries. I always feel like I want a whole new start in life. In a new environment, new people, simply said, everything new.

2009-06-24T12:22:00.002+08:00

I know, I know. I have not been updating this stupid blog. I have been really busy. Last week was probably one of my busiest week this year. Birthday party at Zouk, drinking session at Pasir Ris, went to the gym, swimming at Jurong East, dance comp at Double O, birthday celebration at Sentosa. And supposingly going out with fellow EVSS schoolmates on Sunday. But it didnt happen coz I fell asleep. I am sorry peeps.

Anyway, I enjoyed every single moment of my times with friends, despite having reckless sleeps! Waiting for pictures!!

And I can't wait for Tranformers!! Watching it with my lovely friends this Saturday at Ehub. There are 20 of us!!!

2009-06-09T12:19:00.006+08:00

I'm tired. I'm tired of almost everything. I'm sick of the dramas in my life. Well if only life would be as dramatic as in Heroes or Gossip Girl, that I would not mind. If I were to have powers like in Heroes, I could easily run away from troubles by easily flying to anywhere where I can take a break. I can just use my super strength to hit anybody I would. Especially those mat reps. And if I were as rich as anyone in Gossip Girl, I could control my friends instead of me listening to them by simply bribing them with money. Or even the people in MOE to make sure I get to my preferred Polytechnic course. You make the rules. And everyday would be a party day.

But reality is, it's hard to escape anywhere especially when your in Singapore and you barely have money to escape. And sometimes you just have to give in when it comes to friends or whatever. And you can't enjoy much too. And your life is about studying...and then working. Just how this is gonna end??? Things really just don't go the way I want it to be. That just sucks. ALOT.

Perhaps I watched too much dramas. But well, sometimes you do wonder why your life couldn't be better. Well it's not that I am wanting too much, but seriously, I am not asking much. If I could, a very simple life would be enough for me than this!

P.S I just started watching new TV show Chuck and it's great! Current hot fave. Well I know, i'm a TV drama geek, freak whatever you wanna call it.

2009-06-06T12:42:00.002+08:00

I have not been updating my blog recently. And yes, I know my blog is getting dull and plain because I know I didn't upload any photos for the past month, or months I think. If only I have a camera, then it would be different. Haha.

Well this month I am looking forward to alot of stuffs. Going to my cousin's birthday party. Then, 2 of my beloved friends' birthday which is coming soon; Herda & Susi. And lastly, going out with my seconday school friends! I know it has been a year since we last went out together. Well perhaps everyone has gone their own ways. Still, they were part of my life and I really want to meet them badly! They are Fito, Liyana & Zhi Wen, including zyk.

Well I guees just that. Bye!!

2009-06-02T19:38:00.002+08:00

Life has been the same for me. Still sucky at times. Haha. So now that the holidays are here for most of the students in Singapore, it's time to enjoy with friends!!!! And this time around, Surfers has planned something different for the holidays. We are doing more healthy activities together!!

Instead of going out to town or watching movies and wasting $$$$$$$, we are going to do sports!! HAHA! Badminton, soccer, captain's ball. bowling, swimming, cycling and etc. And they're cheap too!

And I can't wait for my lovely cousin's birthday party on 13 June!! Well, she gonna make a party at Zouk!!! How more fun can it be?????!!!! I'm going!! And I get to invite only 5 friends of mine. So who's the lucky ones?? Oh age limit still applies...that means...18 years old!

2009-05-20T11:25:00.003+08:00

For once, I thought you called me. Only to know that it's another friend calling me using your number. Haizz. Perhaps I am still hoping. But I don't know. If I were to lie and tell myself everytime that I don't care anymore, that would be self-denial and foolish. But yet again, there is no point crying over spilled milk. When you know at the end of the day, it doesn't matter anyway. Coz for what I have learned in life, people must keep moving on. Everyday is a new beginning for something. No point pondering over the past coz there's a whole new future awaits you.

Anyway, I really have to work hard. To achieve good grades. And I know I can do it despite no one thinks I can achieve that. Then again, I don't need what people think of me coz what matters, is whether I can believe in myself and achieve it.

2009-05-18T13:07:00.004+08:00

I am making a change starting from today!! And I don't need anyone's support or help. Coz when u realise, all it takes to change is you,yourself. You control your own life.

2009-05-15T02:11:00.004+08:00

I AM SUPER HAPPY!!!! Coz yes, I am watching Angels & Demons in 19 hours time!! Haha. Can't wait!!

And yes, finally, I can't believe I watched Gossip Girl. I know, the movie is so gay, but isn't that gay as it sounds. haha. Well, since it will take awhile before Heroes will play its new season, I decided to catch a new show. And I chose Gossip Girl coz it's particularly like the top tv dramas in every online drama website I go, so yeah I gave a shot and I actually find it watchable. So yes Eeka, looks like the drama isn't that sucky as I had mentioned before. Hehe.

P.S Blake Lively (Serena) is so fucking hot. I think she's better than Hayden Panettiere, my favourite TV girl from Heroes. I just love her character/personality in the drama. Wish could find a girl like her. Can that happen?? Hmmm

And this Saturday..time to have fun again! Drink till you die..........

2009-05-11T23:34:00.008+08:00

FINALLY, THE LONG WAIT IS OVER!!! ANGELS & DEMONS will be in theaters on 14 May 2009!! That means it is on this coming Thursday!! Yes, I have been waiting for this movie patiently for years!!! I'm so gonna watch it! Yeah, planned to watch on Friday with friends!

And Fyi, the book Angels & Demons was the 1st book and only book I have read it completely in my life! And that was when I was 15! In other words, I have high hopes for the movie. Hope it do justice for the uber-good book!

And I had a really awesome weekend!!

On Saturday went to Padang at City Hall to celebrate a friend's birthday; Zu from Kx's. Totally gerek. Quite a number of people were there. I did enjoy myself despite having a slight fever. Luckily Wan brought his Panadol and I was feeling much better after tooking the pills.

After the birthday party was over, me and a few decided to chill out at Esplanade. Looking that the night is still young, Fie decided to go to Tantric Bar. And so we did! Finally I went to a bar this year! I didn't buy any drinks but my friends shared theirs with me. I didn't have the mood to dance though in the bar. But I still have fun listening to the songs. Tantric is the best place to chill coz the songs are cool and the drinks are cheap. Not for some other reasons..hehehe.

P.S Initial plan was to go Tantric with Andreas, Farah & Sam. But I ended up going with the others. Haha. Next time perhaps, my lovely friends. This Saturday, maybe????? :D

On Sunday, went to celebrate Danish's birthday. Yes my cute little nephew is now 3 years old!! We celebrated at Ehub. Went to eat at Pastamania. After that, the whole family went to watch Jangan Tegur, except me. That is because I have already watched it. And my mum is freaked out by the movie. And the movie is still haunting her. Especially the part where the long-haired lady was possessed. Yes, it reminds of a relative of ours who ever been possessed. And they look alike a lil bit too!! Creepy.

Things I am looking forward :

1) LEFT 4 DEAD with Surfers. Yeah, haven't even tried it once. Despite several times you guys went to play it, I wasn't there always too.

2) Double O on 22 May right, Mael?? I'm sooo gonna come!! Time to enjoy life once again

3) Tantric with Andreas, Farah & Sam with the others. Or at least finish up our Absolut?? HAHA.

4) Movies with friends. Harry Potter....Transformer. There's so much to watch for this year!!

5) Gym. ANYONE UP FOR THIS? I AM A LONER WHEN IT COMES TO THIS!

2009-05-09T01:52:00.003+08:00

I AM SUPER SUPER LAZY TO UPDATE!!!

But maybe I'll update soon. And I wanna go club badly!! tomorrow, please!! Believe it or not, I have not yet club this year!! How shitty is that?? Must enjoy life this year!! Before NS...hahaha

2009-04-30T00:37:00.005+08:00

I know I have not been updating. But the interest to update is ceasing slowly. Despite the fact that I have done nothing much these days, I still feel so restless.

And my life is boring because....... Heroes Season 3 has just ended!!!!!!! That means I'll have to wait for months before Season 4 is released!! That totally sucks!!

And lately, I have been having weird dreams. And Munira, if your reading this, I dreamt of you becoming fat!! Haha. Very funny....LOL

2009-04-19T21:13:00.002+08:00

Yesterday, I did went to City Hall to celebrate Black's birthday!! The ones there were Didi, Wan, Farah, Sam, Herda, Hasif, Daniel and Faizal Skin. Yeah went to chill out there and then at night head to Downtown East. There comes Shikin and Afad. They came to meet us as E Hub. We played bowling there. Well I didnt play bowling though coz I didnt have the mood to play. But the rest did. At around 2 am, me, Shikin, Hasif, Afad, Daniel and Faizal Skin went to watch Fast and Furious 4!! Quite a good movie, but wasn't as good as the the other 3 movies. Then after movie the rest all go home. Last standings were me, Farah and Sam. We went back home around 7 am. And I laughed alot again!!! Haha. I know it can be very annoying. But it's hard to control!!! LOL

P.S The only thing to regret was that we didn't took any pictures!! But it's ok

2009-04-18T05:04:00.002+08:00

I am happy. Yes. Today was a great day!! Well unexpectedly, old friends Hasif, Dan, Acit and Farhan went to lepak with us. Like finally, after months!!!! Seems like everything between us have been better. I am really content. I really miss the old us. The big group. I hope we will be together once again. And later today, going out to town to celebrate Black's birthday!!! And again, I hope everyone's there!!!! And I wanna have fun before everyone is getting even busier with school. Yes, Herda & Zach is starting their school this coming Monday! So they will be busy too!! haiz....ok Bye!!!

2009-04-15T14:05:00.006+08:00

13 friends that I truly miss alot( not in order) :

Wan

Shikin

Herda

Andreas

Farah

Sam

Eeka

Hasif

Dan

zyk

Muni

Fie

Ayeen

I have been staying at home for 2 days straight!! And the boredom is killing me!! I know its been only 2 days. Still, I can't stand being at home only. Perhaps used to going out everyday. Everyone is either busy schooling or working. I understand. But hope to meet you guys soon!! :D

Now I wana watch Heroes!! Hehe

2009-04-14T14:32:00.003+08:00

Yeah I know I have not been updating. Life has been quite hectic for the past weeks. But now that holidays are over, everyone's back in school. That means life won't be as busy. So I guess I can update more often. Back to boredom again. Well it's ok. You can't expect life to always be your way and have fun all the time. So I guess now I will use my free time to study and perhaps put in more effort to exercise regularly. I know I procrastinate alot when it comes to exercise but who knows. I might just work out later!! Haha.

And sometimes I keep wondering how everything can change in just a matter of few months..few weeks or even in a few days. All I can say I learnt alot from this year. It's the time where I realised that things happens for a reason and I have to accept it whether I like it or not. And for once, I want to make 2009 a good year for me. I want to achieve something. Whether it's about studies or my weight or anything else that matters.

How I wish the year wasn't tough and rough for me. But fact is, it is. But it's ok. I have to move on.

2009-04-07T01:20:00.002+08:00

Been busy for the past week. No, not busy working or whatsoever. But busy chilling out with friends and all. Haha. And I'm too lazy to update anything actually. But before the blog turns rusty, I have to type this. Tomorrow meeting a close friend of mine to sort things out. Yes, it is about time right? Ok promise to update more soon. :D

2009-04-03T00:40:00.002+08:00

To my close friend, I know life has been hard for you for the past few days. To endure such pain is a torture. Still, life goes on. I know it is too much for you to handle but just take this as part of the parcels in life. I want to apologize if I have not been much of a helping hand. I have never been good in sorting out relationship matters. I can be your good listening ear, but not a good advisor. Still, I am trying my best to help. I hope that you will be fine soon. Like really soon. I want everything to go back in track. To have fun and enjoy life to its fullest!!

P.S You are still young and there is still a long way to go. Everything that is happening to us right now is merely just certain parts of our life. There's more to go and we'll see what the future will bring for us. Hold on and stay strong!

2009-03-27T14:18:00.032+08:00

Here are photos taken recently or some old photos that I just get hold of. Enjoy!!

2009-03-24T23:29:00.006+08:00

Today went to town with Wan, Shikin & Khai. We went from Orchard to City Hall by walking. Had fun. Then we went to meet Andreas at City Hall and I get to eat brownies!!Thanks to Andreas. But the best is still Mrs Fields! Craving for that! LOL.

P.S I just get hold of pictures taken recently from various outings, and also some really old pictures too! Will post it soon aite! :D

2009-03-21T11:19:00.012+08:00

Finally, you have posted in your blog about everything and that you have cleared your head. Well, that is good rather than you bottle it up. Ok so I read it already and yes, I'm going to comment on your posts in details. FYI, I am not doing this deliberately to hurt you even more or for being just a bitch; but simply because I want to give a piece of my mind. And I hope you would appreciate it too. So I did step by step. ORANGE COLOUR IS YOUR POST IN YOUR BLOG.

Seen any heartfelt posts from me recently?Nope, I guess not. I'm living a life. And I try to make it the best life I'm gonna have. All those emo posts, the ones that I do not want to let ANYBODY read are in my other blog. You can say I'm having funfunfunfun every single day. But have you read my other blog? I don't think so.

Ok, how could I read and know when I wasn't even invited to your blog??????? If I had known earlier, maybe I thought I would be more merciful. I mean it's only common if I were to feel devastated when we had this problem for quite some time, and yes, when I go your blog, it looks like you had only but FUN. You could let me in your PRIVATE blog and maybe slowly I would know your feeling better. But no, when I heard about your new blog, of coz it is only human for people to think ' ok so she had a private blog and I am eager to know coz yes, I was once a close friend. I wana know her part of the story too. But wait, I am not invited!! Why is it so?? Ok ni confirm she talk about me and the rest. Beh tanak bilang kita la. like what the hell!! ' Dont deny, coz if you were in my shoes, you would feel that way. The evil assumptions and all. So how was I to know? How was we to know??? If what you said is true, you could let us in and maybe we could understand you at the very least. But you make it like your running away from the situation and not caring a hoot about it. Even maybe, when you knew deep down you knew you were super sorry and you want to make things better, but you didnt show it as much as you could. And of coz people might assume that you didnt care. remember, ACTIONS SPEAKS LOUDER THAN WORDS. And procrastination never is a good thing.

Things change, People change. That's what you said. I can't help but wondering, Do you really believe in that? And do you actually accept that?' Times are changing and I have to agree. Sure, everyone have new friends. Including me and I cannot deny that. Life is unfair and unjust. Like I've said, I may have new friends, but that doesn't mean I'm ditching you guys. I have to set aside some time with my family, you and the rest. I'm sorry too cos I know I have been apart with you guys for so long. I wonder, if I were to be still at ITE Bishan and not transferred to Simei, would this problem start? I would think our friendship would gradually lessen, just like ours with Muni. What I miss, I REALLY MISSED and regret letting go was with Fizykal & Co I regret letting them go, them Liyana, Zhiwen and Fito. The old days, the kental days where we'd do stupid things and experience the new. The time we'd take any random bus and get lost. The time we smoked, our first sip of alcohol.

I do believe things change and that people change. And it could be for the better or for the worse. But for us, it seems its the latter. Well life is unfair and unjust. blah blah blah. We humans take advantage of these phrase to use it as our excuse to cover up something or other things. YES. ok. It is true. Life is unfair and unjust but only to a certain extent and it is only for certain circumstances. But for me, it's we humans who can always makes a difference in our life. We control our life. We determine our life in what way it should be. It all depends on our choices. And choices have consequences ( We learned it from Adam Khoo, OI!). Again, it could be a good one or a bad one. And in my perspective, when it comes to family, friends and studies, we can determine ourselves in what way it should be. We are responsible for how things are handled and how the outcome turns out. Yes, I believe in that. You can't say oh mum I'm a bad child for you. Sorry life is unfair. And in other way, you just can't say, I'm sorry if I did that to you, my friends. Life is unfair. NO. You can barely well did things your way. It's whether you want it or not. It's that simple. And I am sorry looks like you did not do the best for me and the rest. Again, I feel this way because ALMOST EVERYONE can do it so why can't you? They could handle their times for each every things so damn good, why can't you? But it is ok la. It doesnt matter now anymore questioning this. Its over.

Ok now I am touching about if you were to transferred to ITE Bishan. Seriously, would you really feel that way? That you think our friendship will lessen? Now I am questioning you. I thought there should be faith and confidence in a friendship? So why must you feel that way? So you're using Muni as an example. Well, to me that is ridiculous. Muni will always be part of us ( if you still feel that way) and our friendship can never be changed. At least, I do feel that way still. But yes, she has not been with us. But why? You should bloody know the reason. Imagine if her parents werent to strict, I think we would still be as close meeting her everyday. I know her. I can feel that she still treat us as her close friend. Do you feel that way too?? Or what??
It's just that because Muni is in a diff sch and from last time we know even in EVSS, that Muni is the kind that she have to go home straight after school and cant go out on weekends either. But just thankfully, when we were in the same sch, she can lie to her parents. But now in ITE, it seems really hard coz her mom knows her schedule all. So she cant lie. But still, if she had an opportunity to meet us, she would do that right away. I can assure you. And in her case I can say her life is unfair. She really cant go out coz she got super strict parents. So we can say her life is unfair!

And just take a look at our bunch of friends zyk. You know our group group of friends arent all in the same school so you cant say schools can determine or change the friendship. Look at Hasif. Is he in ITE SIMEI? NO. AFAD? NO.DANIEL? NO. HERDA? NO.EEKA? NO. So I dont see the reason why you have a perception that if you're in a diff sch, our friendship might lessen. Coz I knew my feelings for you as a friend will never change. This are what friendas. No matter what circumstances, friendship should not be changed easily. If yes, then that means the friendship isnt strong.

On Fizykal and Co., yes of course I missed them really badly. I really do. But the situation was different during that time. Me and you, together were in the process of different things. Like just getting know of Surfers. You know having a different lifestyle. Coz fizykal was from a group of classmate friends but Surfers, is where diff people meet together. So maybe we were eager and all to have this wonderful new friends and all. And you know being with them changed your lives. Its what you have become now. The girl who mixes easily with people( ur a pendiam dulu eh hehe), the girl who goes to gigs...it all started with them. All those memories. It's a whole new level.

Were there fights during the last 5 years? Obviously Faizal, and you know it. Always, always, a third person. First Rumi, then Fito, then Syameen. But NOW?? I always tried to just get on with whatever I had and let bygones be bygones. I remembered shedding alot of tears for you in those years. And yet, we're still together. Least for now. If you can try and make this situation like some kind of passing phase like I try to do last time, I would definitely appreciate it. We'll talk. But now I know that you're having your own problems and that you yourself have admitted that you've changed. And I cannot be the person to help you through cos you've stated that too. I cannot blame you for getting mad at me. I cannot blame you cos I've put it on me.
I'm changed, you're changed. But we're still friends and that's all that matter. I may have not become you're bestfriend anymore, or maybe your closefriend, but perhaps just a normal ordinary friend that we just say 'HI!' and BYE! to, but its a shame. A shame that 5 years of love is down in vain.

Yes there were quite alot of fights during those 5 years. If I could recall a miracle or a wonderful thing that happened in my life before, It would be that we had been through so much for 5 years! But if you can recall, the problem of yours had happened for quite alot of times.It's just that this time, it includes me( why??). Remember you and syameen? She didnt like you coz she cant tahan your attitude. And at that period of time almost all of our classmates and other students dont like you. Yes, they were really mean la. And I was foolish to follow them for awhile. But sumpah, last time you are really super irritating and very attitude girl la. Then we met Sheedah. The another close friend of ours. A girl whom we claimed is like our 2nd mother. Then regarding you attitude problem, remember we had a confessional talk just 3 of us? When we tell evrything abt u. We cried I remember. We just wanted you to change coz yes, no matter how sucky a friend is, we must always give a helping hand. So we did. And yes, slowly you changed to be a better person. Then, a year after, things changed again. We 2 wasnt in the same class with our lovely Sheedah. We then met new friends we loved. Muni...Wan!!! Yes. they became our good frens. But then, still I remember not forgetting our old friend, Sheedah. But I remember you did!! And I can tell you now how sad and dissapointed Sheedah was at that point of time. You didnt know that right? She told me, ' zyk makin berubah eh.' and there was a day when you went out with muni all but I insist to be with sheedah. I insisted you to be with us too but you didnt want to ( that can really see how you dont know how to balance your time). So end up me and sheedah talks about you. She told me alot of things la and it saddens us. You know it's about her and you. Im sure you remember the times that I told you that you should be with sheedah more often and all? Ingat tak? Another one, Yuhaniz. The times where you chose to go with her rather than me. I cried alot those periods but you dont know right????????? And most probably you thought I was the shitty one at that point of time. But at the end of the day, you came back to me because you know Yuhaniz was the shitty one and you finally realised she's not a good friend. Tell me about it. I've been through and done alot of things for you. Let me just tell you now. Alot of people still hating you . Not hate la but hate your attitude. People are still asking me how I can tahan you, but it never bothers me la coz a friend is someone who appreciates who they are right.

Now you finally know the reason why I am sooo heartbroken coz I felt really betrayed. I just couldnt take it anymore. Yet I should knew it all along this would happen. Since it happens not just once to our friends in what you have done to them. And yes what a shame we lose a 5 years of friendship. But I realised that its not a matter of time. Friends are based on how deep the friendship is and the bonding and how you prioritize them.

I'm sorry, to only you to you: For the ton part, I would very much appreciate if you could read back on my older posts on how come I can overnight. Its very simple. Its just a click away. =)))))
AND, don't get all hyped up to be. Its between me and Faizal. Oh and one more thing, don't actually believe in what I post every single time. It could be true, it could be faux. So keep your comments to yourself. OK?

I am sorry if my lovely friends are nosey. They are just what friends would do if one of their friend is sad or angry. They are the ones who can call themselves friends coz they would do anything to comfort their friend. Even if they did too much to you, all they wanted was to make me smile again. And yes they did, not because of what that they did to you, but they would actually did to that extent. I am really touched by them. And I hope you and your other friends all the best.

And don't forget, even if Wan is so damn rude and sarcastic in his entry about you, he is still the one who brought us to the rest of friends. U think back again, without him, will we know the others? The others who brought joy and colours into our world. If we do not know them, I think our life will be like nothing...very dull. They taught us alot and u know we owe them alot.

If I were the old Faizal, I would have already solve this problem and give in, and evrything will be like normal. I know I am selfish now. We could have save the frienship, I think we could you know. But there's just too much for me to swallow, I cannot tahan. Furthermore this year was like a fucked up year and you had to add salt to the wound. And looks like the wound will take really really long to heal! So again, I'm sorry it have to be this way. But I changed. And I changed because of you, whether you wana deny it or not.

The times I thanked God for having a good/close/best friend like you.

The times we/you call these group of friends of ours a family.

2009-03-17T00:22:00.005+08:00

I am just dissappointed and loss for words. Ok maybe what I did was a little too much. My personal message, my past blog entries and all. But what I did was what an angry best friend would do to seek for attention from his friend. To at least get a reaction from his best friend. But nothing happens. It almost seems you don't care a hoot about it. If it is true what you said that you still care for the friendship, why can't I see any effort from you? For the past weeks, I put a brave front that I don't mind losing you after what you did, but deep inside, I do care for you coz of all the friendship we have built be it good or bad. Yet, nothing expresses how you feel about this matter. It almost seems like you don't care. Maybe I took it seriously. Or maybe you think it's just a slight matter?

Everytime me and the rest of friends read your blog, everyone is stunned. Like wow, she's enjoying her life so much huh? Wait is it wrong to have fun? No it's not. But can't she see the messages her friend is trying to convey? Is like she's having so much fun..is she sharing with her other friends? Friends that shared their fun with her once many times. So from your blog entries, it looks like nothing has happened in your life and you are so happy; when everytime we read your blog, we felt angry and pissed off. Everyone said, ' wah banyak masa dia untuk dgn orang lain. Untuk kita, punyalah susah.' Tell me, what am I supposed to say? It is the truth that we are stating.

Regarding the Live N Loaded, yes I was pissed off. But I believe your other friend is more upset. She is none other than Shikin. 1stly, you didnt tell me about the tix. I thought you would bring me seriously. But nvm. What you said is somehow true. I dont like gigs. So that is the excuse you gave why you didnt bring me. What about Shikin??? I thought you said you are going with her?? So I asked Shikin, and she said this to me. '' Ya she said she wanted to bring me. But she didnt actually bring me at last. She didnt even inform me. I was shocked la when I read her blog and find out she left me!!''

You really showed like you dont care for us anymore. And yes, I do feel like I'm a second hand friend!! Wow, so you meet us coz you are bored and you have no plans kan?? Seriously I had enough. I feel soooo devastated. And I'm feeling even worse coz it seems like you don't take this thing seriously. Macam takda hal gitu. I was expecting something from you. I thought you could do something about it. But no, you did not. I really don't know If I should call you a close friend of mine anymore or not. I've been through alot of shit and all and you weren't there for me. I had alot and alot of problems going on yet you are busy. Ok busy with your studies is definitely fine. But busy accompanying your friends to eat( like almost everytime) it looks like it is more important. It really hurts alot coz I want you to be the one sharing my problems with but you are no longer there anymore. I totally give up. Tell me how many times these problems come and I am always the one to correct it.

I really don't understand you. You have changed alot. I don't know. you said this to me once and I'm gonna say it back to you. Who are you and what have you done to ZYK??

DONT CONTACT ME ANYMORE IF CAN. NO IM NOT TRYING TO GET RID OF YOU IN MY LIFE. I JUST WANT SPACE AND TIME FROM YOU FOR THE MEAN TIME COZ I WANT TO ENJOY LIFE TOO. I DONT WANT TO BE THE ONE SUFFERING WHILE YOU ARE SOOOOO HAVING MUCH FUN IN YOUR LIFE LIKE AS IF NOTHING HAPPEN GITU.

Oh, and fyi, I am not interested with the live n loaded tix. It was a test to see who you would actually cared to bring ah. And aku orang jiwa. Even if you have a tix for me, but not for the rest of OUR friends ( I remember I thought shikin was supposingly your gig partner), I wont go. So forget about it. The answer is clear already.

2009-03-16T13:40:00.006+08:00

You see, I dont want my posts to always be about friends, but seriously, my friends are the ones that are keeping me strong every day. Go to wan's blog, Herda's blog and here they were talking about friends. And I am really touched once again that I am both posted in both their blogs as one of the good friends that they loved so much. It really means alot to me. Because you see, I have already lose a close friend but these friends are the ones that made me realise that there are still friends that cares about their friendship so much. And God bring me these wonderful friends in my life. In fact, the bonding between us has tighten and I'm thankful.

2009-03-15T00:42:00.002+08:00

Went out with wan and shikin on Friday. Had really alot of laughters. Like really alot until me and wan almost wanted to vomit!!! LOL. Then at night ton with dancers at Tampines as they were having an overnight practice. Farah, Sam, Herda, Black were there too. Yeah 1st time Surfers actually went to ton with the dancers to accompany their practice. Very funny la coz Farah, Herda & Sam tried to learn how to dance. Very cute.

On Saturday, went out to town with Wan, Herda & Eeka. It's us 4 again. Yeah it's quite some time since we went to town.

Sorry no pictures for the outings. Next time perhaps.

2009-03-12T13:54:00.005+08:00

Just get back home after working at the family stall. Business were good today. That's a relief. Later meeting Wan & Andreas. They have dance practice at Tampines. Maybe Herda is coming down too and I wanna see her new laptop! Lucky her la. Haha. And I can't wait on Saturday. Time to enjoy again!

Oh and guess what?? I have a big bottle of Nacho Cheese in my house! Best right?? My cousin gave it to the family. Ok random.

And I wana put a special post for Wan, my another current close friend. So yesterday I told him about the friends test in which I posted earlier. And his reply was, " True, your friends love you". And I was like ' wow, thank you'. Then he continued '' you're my close friend sia''. HAHA! To those who knows Wan, you know that he's not the type who said something like that! Very rare ah. But he's been different nowadays. As in better la. He gives people advise and all. Very surprising. Good good.

2009-03-11T23:13:00.007+08:00

FRIENDS

I took an online test about friends. I know it's lame but no harm doing it. So below is the result.

What does being a friend really mean to you?

You value your friendships: 70%

You love your friends very much - so much so that it's actually quite a worry. You may not be able to cope very well when you do lose somebody's friendship. You are a very sensitive and fragile person, and are therefore likely to get upset easily. You care for your friends and are willing to do anything that they ask you to do. Sometimes this can make your friends think that you are a bit of a nuisance. Nevertheless, people do really love you because your highest priority is your friends.

my opinion:

As much as I shouldn't believe it, somehow I do have to agree. I may be big and all but my heart is very fragile. I am sensitive when it comes to this, that is when I started being paranoid and naive, and the fear of losing a friendship coz I really love all of my friends. Time to time I said this. As much as I've said that I've move on, still fact is I don't. I do hope things would be better and I wana try my best to keep the friendship going but yet I had enough trying yet the other party wouldn't. See now, it is a worry coz I think too much about friends coz for all I know, they think I'm being a such a nuisance for being too deep in these too. So let it be.

2009-03-08T12:55:00.007+08:00

Danceworks

So yesterday I did went to to Danceworks with friends. Congrats to Fantastic Boys for getting through to the finals. I think they did a fantastic job! Fantastic Girls were good too, all of them were super hot. Hehe. Unfortunately they didn't get through but at least they did the best they could I guess.

Family

It's been exactly a week I helped the family with the stall. Yes, consistently. Have been going home quick for the week. I actually went home around 10 + nowadays. And I have been waking up at 6am!!! Haha. wonderful right? If only I could do the same during school times. Which in fact, I have never in my ITE life! And the best part is that I am happy because my mum did not nag at me at all. Very peaceful my life these days. All I can see is a smile on her face, like finally. I do not have the intention to make her angry anymore. I like the way it is now.

Finally, random pictures for you. I will upload pictures during Danceworks once I got it from friends.

Me & good friend, Shikin

My small little nephew, Danish! Cute right? Like his uncle.

2009-03-05T04:23:00.005+08:00

I can't sleep now. Woke up at 1am!!Haha. But that's because I slept at 1pm. Anyway, I can't wait for Danceworks this coming Saturday!! My good friends, Andreas & Fie are joining with Fantastic Crew. And I can't wait to see the item they will be doing. And I will get to meet my other beloved friends too who will be there supporting them. Other well-known crews will be there too. So peeps if your free, do come down. Danceworks will take place at Plaza Singapura. Time is ard 1pm I think??? And I'm saving up money for 13 March. Planned to go St James but it is yet to be confirmed I think. But I hope we'll go la. Wanna enjoy like how I used to. Promise me it will happen, zyk? This is your way to redeem urself!! Hahaha jk :D

2009-03-04T00:42:00.005+08:00

Finally I went out today after 2 days at home. So I've been really helping out my family with the stall. I feel better now coz I guess I am stabilising my time to be with my family by working at the family stall and spending time with my friends. So today I went to accompany wan for his dance practice at Dome. Before that I went to buy a new earpiece for my mp3. I just bought a simple and cheap earpiece that costs me only $7.90. Haha. Herda, Afad & Shikin was there too at Dome. So we spend time together once again. Best. After practice was over, me, Andreas, Herda, Shikin, Afad & Wan lepak under the block near Tampines block. I was bored for awhile coz everyone was doing their own stuffs and I decided to camwhore with Herda. LOL. I know I hate taking pictures but it doesn't kill to take at times. :D

2009-03-02T01:02:00.022+08:00

I still feel nauseous now. Bcoz of those booze I guess. Hate this feeling. Yet it is good too coz I won't have the mood to eat ALOT. Haha. Anyway just really had fun with Ayeen, Fie all.

Somehow I wanna know how fun 2009 will be for me. Coz all I knew, 2008 was the best year I ever had with friends. I really miss all those times. I can't help it but to remember the fun times I had with my circle of friends. The beginning of this year doesn't look that fun to me. I don't know why but there seems to be alot of quarrels and misunderstandings and it sucks coz everyone tends to go their seperate ways currently. But of coz I do hope everything will be fine soon. Who knows what happens in months to come??

Below are simply the best moments I could recall last year 2008.

Limited KX's

Had fun dancing with my group. But it's over for me now (dancing) . Still, I do enjoy accompanying my friends to practice. Supporting my beloved friends for their several comps especially Wan, Andreas & Sue and gave them the moral support. Remember those times we ton. The best would be with Andreas, Fie & Ayeen. We really ton alot. Haha. Really memorable. I miss those laughters and the talks we had always.

Surfers

It's fun going out with a big group. Weekends usually spent with them to town. I really love them as my company. This bunch of friends really made your day with them. I miss those periods where me and wan would go to Downtown East or 424 CC to accompany Herda and the rest while they were studying for their 'O' levels. Another part which I liked the most is the period where me, wan, zyk, farah, nitro and shikin would go to Sam's house. Swimming at the pool, drinking, did the so-called club in Sam's room and LG(Haha to Shikin). Then on weekends, we would go to town and after that, everyone would proceed to Herda's house to ton together and watched dvds. And the best moment ever is of coz during the acting shoot. That I have to say is where I am starting to get close with Nitro, Farah & Sam. I am really grateful I get to act and having you guys there with me, supporting and encouraging me. And I love clubbing with them too. The best clubbing partners would be Nitro( the best of coz), Shikin, Eeka, Wan, Farah & Sam. I miss those times la soooo much!! But now, I don't know why I dont see these funs anymore. I guess I'll have to wait and see.

Nitro & gang ( Shikin, Afad, Dan, zyk, Wan)

I always like going out with them. They taught me alot of stuffs about how to be confident, to be brave, boosting your self-esteem. I missed those times we went cycling!! Remember that we cycled from Pasir Ris to Harbourfront??? Then we made music too all thanks to Nitro. Haha. And I knew we always went to Shikin's neighbourhood playground then we played blind mice and all. We were like kids ah! But it was fun trying to be young at times.

All I hope 2009 would be another great year with friends

2009-03-01T19:27:00.003+08:00

WORST PIT YET BEST PIT EVER

Ok, so our close dance friends X's or formerly known as KS had a pit yesterday at Pasir Ris Park to celebrate Mael's Birthday. Me & zyk went together to the pit coz we came a lil late ard 8pm. And upon reaching the pit, the rain started to drizzle and the next thing we knew, it was raining cats and dogs!! Everyone there were rushing to the tent to keep ourselves dry. And imagine 10 people in a small tent crowded with all the bags, food and drinks! And the worst part was, the tent wasn't that safe after all coz we realised that the tent was slowly flooding with water!! After eating in the tent,me and a few decided to just go out from the tent and play in the rain! Haha so we did. It was fun despite our clothes were all soaked! We had another 2 tents and 1 of them is totally flooded with rain and it looks like a mini swimming pool! Haha. That was the place for us to play. The other tent was the smoking area. Haha. You can see the tent covered with smoke.

So I think after an hour or so, the rain actually stopped. So we brought out the foods and drinks to the pit back. And we started the fire to barbeque the foods and all. And just thinking that the weather should be alright by then, luck wasn't by our side. It started raining again!! Haha. very kecoh la and very fucked up the day it was coz of the rain, yet i think everyone did enjoy themselves doing crazy stuffs. haha.

Best and worst part of the day, was the drinking part. Thanks to Ayeen for buying alot of drinks! Got Vodka, Black Label and even white wine!! I drank like really alot and the feeling was great coz it's been long time since I drank that much. Maybe last year? So ya, I get drunk but my drunkness is not irritating don't worry. So the last 3 who stopped drinking was me, Sue and this new friend we made. It was already 6+ coming to 7. So me and Sue we talk crap alot haha and I told some secrets to her. Yeah, Sue, ur the only one who know about my crushes and all so SHHHH!! Haha. So that was the best part here.

THE WORST PART WAS, after everyone went in to the tent to sleep, I went to the nearest toilet all by myself. And by then, I feel so fucked up. I wanted to shit and vomit at the same time!! Yeah so I did!! It was so painful la and at that point of time, I was really really high already. I was so drunk that I really can't get out from the toilet so yeah, I slept in the toilet at the cubicle for like, maybe around 1- 3 hours??????!!!!! Yup, I did! And I vomit like really really alot!!! WTF!

2009-02-26T23:52:00.005+08:00

FAT & GETTING FATTER

Just what is happening to me??!! I've been eating alot lately. Fuck my big appetite! And seriously, I can't fit some of my clothes & pants already! That's bad, I know. Trying my best to control my food intake but it seems really hard. Get upset or stress easily nowadays. So I tend to eat more whenever I feel sad or stress. But when I am happy, I must eat alot too!!! LOL. I know, it's scary to be me!

I remember back in few years, I only drink plain/mineral water on weekdays. Weekends are for me to indulge in soft/sweet drinks. Then I would actually cut raw vegetables etc. cucumbers to eat for lunch or that is what I would bring to school during break. I avoid oily foods on weekdays too except weekend. And I would squeeze time just to exercise at the gym or do some workouts at my room, or jog at the nearby park. You can ask my witness, zyk. Haha she knows that very well. Everytime she would call me at night, I would be panting while talking to her coz I was busy exercising. Hahaha.

NOW, looks like I eat fried foods almost everyday. And despite having alot of free time, I still don't use the time to exercise! And I dread eating vegetables/fruits now. Haha. Bad bad. Back in those days, I lose 20 kilos in a matter of half a year. Now, it seems even hard to lose a kilo!!!!!

I want my size to be at least like 3 years ago( pictures below ). Still fat, but still better than now!! That was the period my size was the smallest I ever had.

WHAT HAPPEN???????????????

2009-02-24T02:09:00.004+08:00

Mum has been nagging that I should help the family out with the stall. Yeah I think I should start helping my family and do something good since I am so free nowadays.

Anyway, went to my lovely friend's wedding on Sunday. I hope your marriage life will last long! I am really happy for you!

And I still don't know why but I feel like we weren't as close as before. I know you tried your best to please me but I just don't feel it. And trust me, I don't care anymore. Don't ask me why I'm like this. Perhaps I've grown up to actually not be bothered by teenage friendships etc. Of course your still my good friend but just not the same as before. Your just not that important as how you used to be, that's all.

But of course, I do still treasure friends who still look out for me most of the times. I'm not that heartless, but maybe just a little bit. But don't blame me. We live but in a cruel world. Haha.

2009-02-20T13:24:00.004+08:00

My life couldn't be any worse!! I'm trying my best to hold on and be strong! Thanks to my friends to be specific, wan, Shikin, Hasif, Herda & Andreas for being there and trying to help me with my problems. Much appreciated. It really made me feel much better with the concern and help.

Today, as in later I'm gonna have a small picnic with my group of friends. Just gonna have fun and try to forget my problems!

2009-02-17T00:05:00.017+08:00

2 days straight lepak-ing with wan ONLY. Yep. I don't know where's the rest of friends. It looks like they're busy with their own life; spending time with their other friends, or are just busy doing their own stuffs. It don't bother me anymore. And maybe it's not a bad thing after all. I told wan that this would be the period I should spend time at home often to take a rest and have a long break of everything before I have to fully concentrate on my studies in which I really have to! And perhaps, I should start spending more time with my family.

And as for wan, I told him that he could be at home to study hard for his upcoming big exam which is on March.

And seriously, I do not know what's with certain friends nowadays. I came across a friend's blog and this is what he/she said, '' friends, when you need them the most they're not there''. Trueness.

Sometimes I wonder, I've always tried my best or at least the best I could to please my friends, but will they be doing the same for me? Would they even care? And if I would sacrifice myself for them, would they go to the extent to do that for me too?? Would they even bother? From the looks of it, I aint feeling that somehow.

Or perhaps, am I expecting too much from friends?

And of coz, I made mistakes too. To my friend, I'm sorry for neglecting you at times. I know you know but maybe you are used to it so you don't speak out. I was probably quite choosy over friends. But I know I am not appreciating the friendship. But now do I realise sometimes the ones that you are neglecting are the ones who really cares about the friendship. This friend of mine is none other than Andreas. :D

2009-02-16T18:13:00.003+08:00

I'm super super fucking bored at home! And life seems even more boring than ever! It seems hard to even contact friends to chill since everyone seems to go their own way now.

I don't know what's happening to me but I get pissed off easily and everyone seems to get on my nerves now! Need anger management NOW!!!

2009-02-15T12:11:00.004+08:00

Valentines' Day

Well I thought the day would be fun but it turns out to be super fucked up! Well the reason is me myself la. Well I was not in the good mood at all yesterday.

Before meeting my friends to celebrate Valentine's, I was at my relative's house for some birthday celebrations. And before that in the afternoon had to do alot of stuffs. So everything was rushing and hectic. Felt pissed off la. And then the weather was fucking hot and humid!! I hate that! I perspire profusely and it can be every irritating uh. And then at last me and my friends end up not knowing where to go to chill and boredom gets the best of me. So I didnt went back with Wan & co. Went home earlier. Sorry but my body just feels uncomfortable and I was moody that's why the rush to go back home asap.

So upon reaching home, I went straight to the bathroom and bathed with cold water!! Like finally! Best!! And for the 1st time after few months, I actually switched on the air-con in my room! Felt really relaxing and I slept right away! Haha.

2009-02-10T00:53:00.004+08:00

I always tried my best to help them friends and solve their problems but this time it looks like it's not working. I don't know what is the real problem too actually. Things just happened. All I know it was just a very big misunderstanding. And no one wants to give in. Or even tried to correct it. Their friendship is drifting apart. I want them to be like the old times where everyone's happy with a big group. I guess I better leave it to fate and let nature takes it's course. We'll see.

2009-02-09T01:11:00.030+08:00

Went out with zyk and Shikin. Went to Orchard. Was supposed to meet wan and the rest at Zouk but end up we went seperate ways because we need to find something at Orchard. Had fun and laughters. Miss both gals alot. It's been quite some time since we last went out together. But of coz it was incomplete coz usually there would be me, Wan, zyk & Shikin, 4 of us going out together. Next time maybe aite?

Pictures below. Well girls are usually camwhores so most of the pictures are just zyk with Shikin. And as for me, you readers should know by now that I dislike taking photos. Haha.

2009-02-06T04:57:00.006+08:00

I'm just not in a good mood these past few days. Too much things that are bothering me. Studies, money, family, friends and more.

2009-02-05T01:03:00.008+08:00

FEBRUARY!!!

I am so gonna be busy this month!! And have to save alot of cash too! Reasons why? Below are the plans :

Celebrating Valentine's Day (14 Feb). But this year it's going to be a little bit different coz we will go out as a big group ( me and my friends ) while each of us bring our own partner. Have to save money for some presents of coz. And might hit a pub to celebrate there instead of going to town and chill, like always. That costs money again for drinks.

My friend is getting married!! I'm uncertain about the date but it's around 20-25 Feb. I'm gonna be there of coz. Can't believe my friend is gonna be a wife soon! Haha.

Around 20-25 Feb too, I will bring my friend to a club because she's been wanting to club with me and friends. And it is to celebrate her birthday too. Money again for drinks.

Around the same date too 20-25 Feb, Surfers will have a chalet. A gathering for us, friends. Looking forward to it. And each member have to pay 10 bucks for the food and etc.

Lastly, during late Feb, there will be a pit to celebrate a friend's birthday. It will be a suprise birthday party so ya, I can't tell who is the b'day boy/girl. As again, have to fork out money for food and drinks etc.

February may still be the starting of the year, but there are so much things going around for me thats for sure!! Haha. But I'm looking forward to everything. But what matters is, can I save enough cash for all events? That's a question I can't answer!!

2009-02-03T23:49:00.008+08:00

CITY ALIVE!!!

City Alive was superb! I danced like crazy with my friends and dancers. The night was really great. Too much to say about the night but I am seriously lazy to type. So overall, I had fun!

2009-01-31T04:32:00.009+08:00

Family

I don't know why but it seems like we're falling apart. I don't even know how to begin with all the problems that has caused in the house. I thought that everything is going smoothly when all of the sudden, the fight and hatred came again. I never really posted about my family problems here. And in fact I've never really told anyone my friends about the problems I had but now, it seems like the situation is getting worse and I can't take it anymore!!! How many tears I shed despite trying my best to be strong as a young man. But its just so painful to see your own sis fighting shouting with your own mum. It almost seems like they are enemies now.

I love you both so much and I can't stand when you both are fighting. And I feel soo sooo useless that I can't help with the matter. That feels even worse. It's like I really hate myself for being a good-for-nothing brother/son. But all I wanted was just us to be ok but it seems like you both are expecting so much. I thought our family was the perfect family anyone could find but seems like it is not anymore. I don't know when this fight and hatred is gonna end but seriously I had enough! There were times I actually feel like running away from home but I know I won't coz I love you both so much than anything else in the world!!

Friends

zyk ( Best Friend)

Somehow I got the feeling that we're not as close as before. But maybe I'm just being paranoid. Like you said, you were busy with school and family. But yeah, I just wana say that I miss you alot and there are so much things I wanted to tell you and in need of a listeng ear but you weren't there but I understand your situation too la. well ur still my best friend ok. I'm just telling this again coz I want the whole world to know that I had a wonderful best fren! Haha. And as usual, sorry if I've always been irritating or sarcastic to you.

Wan ( Good friend)

The friend that I'm always with now. So I guess I feel like the friendship is better now la. Coz I do know that we had some issues with each other few months back. Ur blog on what you said, remember? Haha. I am trying my best to please you as a friend coz I can see that you are still irritated with me by my way of talking or how I always broke my promise(eg. bangun lambat when supposed to meet you). But that's just me. LOL. And thanks for being the listening ear for thiese past few days la.

Herda ( friend cum personal motivator)

Even though we're not close with each other but despite being just a normal fren, you still care for me can see that. You always try your best to help your friends and I really appreciate the fact that you're guiding me in terms of life or studies. Your words made sense and it really helped me. I once feel like I wanted to quit school coz all I wanted was to enjoy life but this young lady helped me to realise that studies comes first la and think about my future. The minute she get her 'O' level results and that she get to go Poly, all I knew is that I wanted to focus on my studies. I know that people,friends like to call you names like stupid la..bimbo la but to look back at Surfers, your one of the few to actually go to Poly! Haha. So its a good example lor. People also call me stupid always so I can prove them that I can be smart too I guess. Haha.

And FYI, i still wana quit ITE if can. HAHA. What I meant is to focus on my private 'O'.

P.S And of coz I love my other friends too Shikin, Hasif, Andreas and many many more!

2009-01-29T00:54:00.006+08:00

Today I was supposed to buy myself some new clothes and pants but ended up buying nothing. Well I am still unsure of what to buy ah. This is what happens when an oversized person is looking for new clothes and pants because we have to choose properly what outfit suit us or we might look horrendous. Stress!!!!

Btw, I'm going to City Alive street party this Saturday at City Hall with my friends and yes, my cousin!! Yay. Been a long time since I went out with her so hopefully it will be a fun night out!

And just to make sure my blog don't look boring, I have some random pictures below!!

Me wearing cap feeling hip hop! Haha. It's rare to see me with a cap ya know!

Wan & Eeka's 'shiok sendiri' pictures. HAHA

2009-01-21T19:13:00.024+08:00

Last Saturday went to Funkamania Dance competition with wan and zyk which was held at NUS, to support Andreas in Fantastic Remix and Mael in Pink Dollars. So both crews did get to go to the finals well simply because they really did a fantastic job in the stage. Good luck to Andreas and Mael for the finals. Hope u guys will do even better for the finals!

So after Funkamania, me and wan accompanied zyk to Boat Quay to meet her friends. So yeah, zyk brought us to Sahara. Then me and wan went off by 11.30 pm. Thanks for the treat zyk!! Nothing much to say but yeah had a fun time. Pictures are below!!

Us with crazy/stupid shots!!

2009-01-16T12:06:00.009+08:00

LUCKY DAY

So this lucky thing happened to me like just now only. I was on my way home from school when I decided to go to this bakery shop nearby my house because I usually go to the place whenever I need to grab a bite as they sell really nice buns and breads such as hotdog buns, tuna rolls & sandwiches. So when I reached the shop, I chose this fish flake bun with chicken ham which costs $1.40. And actually I decided to buy more than 1 bun but I only had $2 left so I could only afford to buy 1. So I proceed to the cashier where the lady cashier was busy packing some fruitcakes for this certain customer who was a makcik and was standing just beside me.

All of the sudden, the makcik asked me whether the buns here are nice. And I told her that the buns here are really nice and that I am a frequent customer here. Then she looked at my tray which had only 1 bun and she said, ' Is one bun really enough for you'? ( while laughing). Maybe because by the look of my body, she knew one piece of a small bun is way not enough for me! Trueness.haha. But of coz I lied and said that it is enough for me. Then, she actually offered me to buy another bun as she will pay it for me. I refuse to take her offer since me and her are complete strangers but no matter how much I refuse, she still insist me to take another bun. So in the end, I did take this sausage and cheese bun which costs $1.30. While I was taking the bun, the makcik was paying for her fruitcakes. When I went back to the cashier, I passed her my $2 to pay for my fish flakes bun but then she refuse to take the money and instead, she passed me $10 and asked me to pay both of my buns using the money! And in fact, she asked me to keep the balance money. Before I could return the change to her, she already went off.

So basically, a stranger just passed me $10. Well I am really thankful to this makcik. What a kind heart she had. haha. Unbelievable yet true. And yeah, I enjoyed eating those buns!!

2009-01-15T23:58:00.003+08:00

1stly, I would like to congratulate my friends Herda, Zahrin etc for passing their 'O' levels, and yes, they get to enter to Poly. I am really happy for them. And how I wish I was like them, studying really hard almost every day. I know it is too late but I am taking private 'O' this year. Well I know I'm stupid coz I should have taken it last year but well maybe I wasn't matured enough to think and I am regretful now that I chose to go for Higher Nitec instead of retaking 'O' last year. And now I totally can't make it for my course in Higher Nitec. The course is killing me!! I tried my best to persevere and study but I just can't!! I guess I just have to hold on but it seems like I am confirm taking private 'O'. It may be a long road for me but at least there is still hope for me to reach the destination, right?

2009-01-02T13:43:00.003+08:00

It's 2009!! Well I can't believe 2008 would be a super fast year for me. 2008 is probably the best year for me. Had really alot of fun with all my friends. And not forgetting to mention, I had a great time on countdown with my friends too. I am really happy I was together with all my closest friends. I love you guys alot!! And of coz, I love my family too!

So what is expected of me on 2009 is that I shall be more hardworking, be serious in school and try to lose weight too. Also, balancing my time with friends and family. I am really hoping to be a better guy now.

2008-12-23T18:06:00.015+08:00

Yesterday went to Zouk with Wan, Eeka, Herda, Fara & Sam. I really like the music there it was awesome but it was just too bloody packed that you can hardly move/dance on the dancefloor. So the event at Zouk ends at 3. So we walked all the way from Zouk to Boat Quay and ate Mac's Breakfast!! Then we chill there till 6am and then took the train. Pictures are below.

2008-12-19T00:16:00.017+08:00

Home Club was okay. The place is small now that I know. So I did have fun but wasn't in the mood to dance on the dancefloor.

Anyway, below are the pictures for Wan's 17th Birthday Celebration. So enjoy.

2008-12-17T00:04:00.003+08:00

16th December 2008 is probably one of the worst day in my life!!!!

Well I was supposed to attend a Dikir Barat Workshop in my school at 10am,but guess what? I woke up super super late at 1pm!! Well to my partner/friend Saiful, a very big sorry for not coming but I was super tired because I did not sleep for 2 days and actually, I planned not to sleep because I knew I would wake up late so the day before I was at my friend's house so that they would keep me entertained while waiting for the next day to come but initially, I just slept at the floor like that...and ya, woke up late still!! Aku betul2 minta maaf ah Saiful. It must be hard on you to take care of the workshop alone. Haiz.

Then by right I was supposed to go clubbing at night or should I say right now, but I was grounded! Like what the fuck! This clubbing thing was planned like a week ago and the best part was most of my friends are going and I didn't expect to be grounded!! I was super super fucking angry ah! And I am still now. I'll make sure I get to go to HomeClub tomorrow!

2008-12-15T04:24:00.002+08:00

Celebrated Wan's birthday on 14th Dec at Somerset. Well it was a simple celebration but it was still enjoyable simply because most of his close friends were there. I hope u enjoyed it alot. Yeah you got a cake at last despite a small one.

So basically my life is full of ups and downs but I'm happy I got good friends and family to be there for me most of the times. And I am really busy these days. And tomorrow or should I say later, I will be going to the gym!! Yes, I think it's about time I hit the gym once again and burn my fats!! Well I got myself a personal trainer which is none other than my own friend, Mr Hasif! Haha.

2008-11-17T01:08:00.007+08:00

BUSY WEEK

Wednesday 12 Nov.

Went out with family to Orchard. Watched Quantum of Solace at Lido. The movie's not bad but wasn't as good as Casino Royale. Give the movie 3/5.

Thursday 13 Nov

Went to Sam's house to celebrate Eeka's 16th birthday! Haha. Me and Shikin pushed her to the pool!!

Friday 14 Nov

Me and friends went to Esplanade to chill. Then after that went back to Pasir Ris then meet Wan and zyk. Then as usual, ton.

Saturday 15 Nov

Went to Bugis to go to this small gig at Odiocrib to support our friends' band whom were performing. After the gig, we proceed to City Hall to meet Andreas, Fie and Ayeen. So we lepak there 4 awhile. After the rest had gone, there was only me, Wan, Hasif and Shikin left. So we decided to take a bus that goes straight to Pasir Ris but we found out that we had missed the last bus upon reaching the bus stop. Luckily, there were still buses going to East but only to Bedok Interchange. So we just took the bus and yes, we walked from Bedok Interchange to Pasir Ris!! And the journey took 2 freaking hours! We were all super tired but we had fun walking though. Haha singing and laughing while walking.

Sunday 16 Nov

Watched Madagascar 2 at TM with Wan, Fara & Sam. Good show! I give it 3.5/5!

And now I got to sleep. Bye!

2008-11-09T20:07:00.035+08:00

Last Friday went to Padang to support FX crew!!! Congrats to them for getting 3rd place in the dance competition! Well you guys did a great job and I believed everyone did their best! ;)

Nothing much to say about the day out but it was fun! Pictures are below!!!!

2008-11-06T03:09:00.008+08:00

My life has been hectic these days but I had sooo much fun though. So last Friday, I had an acting shoot done by my friends for their school project. So I was so-called the main actor in the short movie haha and this was the 1st time I acted!! Haha, very fun ah. The shooting ended till Monday so yeah...I tonned all the way. Imagined, 4 days 3 nights!! Got a scolding from my mom but I don't really care because I really enjoyed acting and at the same time spending time with my closest friends and made new great friends too! Awesome experience I gotta say. There are some photos taken from my friend's camera throughout the shooting. Once I have those photos, Im soo gonna post it here!!

But shit too, yesterday, my parents received a letter from my school for an appointment to meet my teacher.WTF. Yeah my school attendance still sucks but Im trying my best to come often!!

And congrats to FX crew for making it to the FINALS for this dance competition which will be held this coming Friday at PADANG!! Woo...its gonna be a fucking big event and Im gonna be there to support u guys man!!! P.S I miss Fie & Ayeen!! :D

Oh..haha and actually, I just came back home. Went to have a birthday bash for my friend, Fad. Haha kena rabak dok. Eggs...flour and red colourings!!! I got the picture!! Enjoy!!

2008-10-26T17:04:00.007+08:00

Yesterday, clubbing was ok. Quite fun la but quite boring too. I only like the drinking part but the dancefloor part, it sucks. I totally dislike the kind of music played. Nonsensical.

I could only find a photo taken yesterday.

And and... I can't wait for Halloween! What should I dress up as?? Have anything in mind for me?? HEHE.

2008-10-25T03:02:00.010+08:00

It has been a busy week lately for me. School, celebrating birthdays and chilling out with friends. And here are the upcoming events that I am looking forward too:

1) Clubbing this Saturday (which is tomorrow)

2) Halloween Party with friends on 31st Oct

3) My birthday!! 1st Nov.

4) My friends' audition for a Dance Comp. 1st Nov.

Well and below are some random pictures that I could find in my hp that was taken just recently. Enjoy!!

2008-10-11T16:16:00.029+08:00

Here are only part of the photos taken on the Hari Raya outings. I will post more once I receive the photos from various friends of mine. Now, enjoy these 1st!!

MONDAY 06/10

TUESDAY 07/10

WEDNESDAY 08/10

THURSDAY 09/10

2008-10-11T15:48:00.015+08:00

Life has been really hectic for me for these past few weeks. Last week I was busy going out to Hari Raya with friends. So went out with my EVSS friends, Pasir Ris friends, and my dance crew! It was fun la but very tiring coz 4 consecutive days went for Raya ( Monday to Thursday). There are really loads and loads of pictures to be uploaded but I need to collect pictures from my other friends too so once I got all the pictures, I will upload it in my blog here!! ;) But I will upload a few which is from me 1st.

Yesterday (Friday), me and my friends decided to take a break from Raya. So the day was more of a chill out day. But 1st went to Yishun to get zyk and shikin's hair done. Well, finally zyk's wish to straighten her fringe has come and Shikin did extension for her hair, which to me long hair looks great on her. Not to mention zyk looks better too with her new hair.

So after getting their hair done, we proceed to Marina Square and meet the rest of the friends. We chilled there late then go to P.ris back and chill again and that's all I have to say. Well below are pictures of yesterday's outing. You can see zyk's and Shikin's new hair for those who knows them and can see the difference. And yes, I do not have pictures of me, coz simply, I dislike taking my own photos.

2008-09-20T04:59:00.002+08:00

I'm confused. I don't know how to begin with my post. Too much things to type, too little time. This post ends here. Get back soon. Bye

2008-09-18T16:05:00.003+08:00

ARGHHHH!!! There's a lot of plans now and all has to be cancelled due to that one stupid thing! Y must it keep ruining my life!!!???

Yay today meeting zyk and Muni. We are breaking fast 2getha. Have to treasure my off days coz I will be packed after today till 27. I wanna do my best for my last. Could I?? Should I??? LOL.

2008-09-15T02:15:00.007+08:00

Hey guys, finally I'm joining a comp. Its a Hip Hop Competition at Bukit Panjang Plaza. It's on 27th September. Hope any of you guys reading this will support my group, Limited Edition. Well this will probably be my last dance before I take a long break in dancing ( like I always do). I wanna said quit but you never know what is ahead of you so yeah. I am really getting sick of dance. Actually no, but getting sick of all the s*%$%@^%^ that I have to endure and be patient with. I think dancing for me is getting to nowhere.

I do enjoy it but I don't think I'm cut out to be a dancer. Always has been a sidekick in the group, always being just a lamp post to the group. No room for improvement. And I just hate the attitude in the group. I'm never looking forward to coming to practice. Listen to people bragging about themselves. Said things that could hurt my feelings. Do things that make me angry. I know I am a loser in here but I'm still a human, I got feelings, I got pride. I know they don't need me and I am pulling myself out, so no worries. I really am not interested on this dance thingy, period.

After 27, I'm all done!! Free like a bird. I'm gonna start working in my family stall, spend more times with my friends that give me all the love I need. It's going to be Hari Raya anyway so ya...it's all about having fun!!

And I have a new interest, which is cooking. Better do something that I can feel good about myself. It's about time I learn culinary skills from my mum, who has been a chef before. There's alot to learn and I'm gonna really learn. Mana tau, I could be a chef 1 day. Hehehe.

P.S I've been keeping it to myself all this while and It's about time I stand up for myself. You guys might not realise, but every little thing said or the actions did do hurt me in many ways. Am I just an object that can be used anytime you want, and when not in need, just being kept? Is it that oblivious to you guys? I want to change but I just can't. So I just give up....... I surrender!!

2008-09-08T20:11:00.002+08:00

FAIZAL???!!! What happened to you???!!!

Today was a hectic and bad day for me!! My CMOS end-year exam started at 11am and guess what?? I woke up at 11am!! I rushed like crazy, took a cab. Run and run till I reached the function hall where I took my exam. Luckily I was still able to take the paper because I really do not know what to do if I were not able to take it. What would I tell to my mum and etc. ? Gosh and I was having a bloody good dream before I woke up!! I dreamt that my group, LE won 1st for a hip hop comp we took part!! LOL

I was sweating and panting in the function hall like a pathetic idiot. Never in my life had I been late for my exam before, never in my life I did not bath to go for a school's exam ( ya it happened today LOL)!

I realised that I have trouble waking up early these days and this is affecting my life. I don't know what is happening. I'm drifting apart with education and I spent less time with family. Sometimes I do wonder, have I changed alot for the worse??

Back in 2 years ago, I was a nerd in EVSS. I do not have much friends. I do not go and chill out with friends alot. My weekends are spent with my family. I always go home straight after school. My life seems boring during those days. Yet, it was great too because I was quite good in my studies. It makes my family happy, it makes me happy. At that point of time, all I wanted was my family to be happy. All I need in my life was them. All I wanted was a good education.

Then suddenly, 2007 came. Slowly and slowly, I started going home late. Started losing focus on studies. Started asking mom for more money. Started going out every weekends. Less time on studies and family, spent more time with my friends. At that point of time, I felt really really happy. Finally I'm having the time of my life; having lots of friends to hang out with, do things with them.

Now I realised how I am drifting apart with my family. Now I realised how my perception is about studies. Lately, I've been thinking not to school coz it's no use. I'm too lazy to study etc. I don't know what has become of me. Why do I think this way?? I used to be determined, I used to be slightly more hardworking. I am confused. I am happy with my life now coz I got freedom, I can do anything I want yet what this supposed to be my freedom gets worse and its taking over me. It makes me feel that I should enjoy enjoy and enjoy and not to think of studies etc.

I'm STRESS!!!!!!

2008-09-06T08:45:00.004+08:00

Can you believe it???

I went jogging today!! Haha.yeap its true. I met up with my friends at 3am then we went to jog from Pasir Ris to Tampines Northpark!! When we reached Tamp, we met up 2 other people then work out at the Northpark fitness corner. LOL.We end our 'exercise' thingy at 5am. Then we proceed to a friend's house nearby and sahur there. After that, went to a block and the rest played cards while I just look and blah blah blah. Ended up reaching home at 8am! And now I can't sleep. If I were to sleep, I'll probably wake up late and not be able to meet my friends on time which is at 2pm!

I really wanna lose weight and I am having the mood for it! Less eat, more exercise! Diet diet here I come!!

2008-09-05T20:15:00.004+08:00

Ok. It's fasting month!! Been fasting....that's good for me. So my usual activity is to meet my friends after buka to study/lepak together till sahur. After that go home, then sleep. then wake up in the afternoon, then the cycle goes on. I can't wait till this Wednesday. Once my exams are over, time to enjoy even more without thinking about studies!!LOL. Baru leh buka dgn kawan2....gi geylang...gi shopping etc.

So below are the 5 things that I wanna buy before Hari Raya:

1) A grey baju kurung

2)A new branded shoe ( Nike or DC)

3) New clothes

4)New pants

5)Perfume (Hugo or CK)

2008-09-01T06:21:00.002+08:00

Last Friday went to Baybeats with a bunch of friends. We reached at Esplanade around evening. Well, honestly speaking, I have realised now how much I am not interested with rock/live bands haha but still I do enjoy some rock bands or tracks if they're really good. So after Baybeats, went to Marina Square to celebrate Faruq's birthday. It was fun. It was sweet. If only my birthday happened the same way.HEHEHE. So Faruq and Andreas end up tonning at my house...and I'm lazy to type what happened on my weekends but all I did was purely lepaking with my friends at Pasir Ris. And now its fasting month. Soon it will be Hari Raya. I'm gonna be happy for quite some time!! But wait, I got my final exam this year! Erm next week actually!

And my blog runs out of pictures again. Soon soon maybe...

2008-08-19T19:19:00.014+08:00

I still hate school! I still hate studies!! But still, I have to study and go to school. For my own good, thats what people say. Sometimes I wonder if only I am smarter, or if not, at least more hardworking. Bottom line is, I just can't!!My big exams are coming in 2 weeks time and I am only starting to study now. Still not too late I hope.

MY WEIGHT!!! MY BODY!!!!!

Currently, I weigh 96-98 kg!! I am really disappointed with myself man! I really wanna try to start losing weight now through diet and exercise but I just cant help eating and eating and I'm just too lazy to exercise!!! I just felt that I was way better back in 2 years. I still remember 2 years back, I actually lost 20 kilos!! yes....20 kilos!!!!!!!!!!!! I was at 1st weighing 104kg and in only a matter of few months (around 2 months if I'm not wrong), I was 84kg!!! You can see how my diet used to be and my progress by looking at my 2006 posts. Go to 'ARCHIVES'. And now all the loss has gone to waste. I'm near to the ''100 kg'' back. SHITNESS! I wonder how I was once so determined and strong to actually shed all those fucking kilos! And now, back to the old fatty bom bom. My face getting rounder...my belly's getting bigger...my neck's getting more and more hidden...my legs becoming more like chicken legs......haiz!! Fucked up life.

Well so people who actually didn't meet me for years, you might think that I've lost weight coz in Friendster, I look not so fat in my pictures but truth is, I really look fat in reality!

THE CHANGES!!

Late 2005 ~ Early 2006 (weight approx. 100 - 104kg)

Late 2006 ~ Early 2007 (Weight approx. 80 - 90kg)

NOW (approx. 95 - 100kg)

I look slightly slimmer during my late 2006/early 2007 rite?? If only I stayed the weight there and continue losing those kilos. It would be easier...better......

2008-08-18T02:26:00.005+08:00

They say i need some rogaine to put in my hair
Work it out at the gym to fit my underwear
Okaley makes the shades to transform a tool
You'd hate for the kids to think that you've lost your cool

Imma do the things that i wanna do
I ain't got a thing to prove to you
I'll eat my candy with the pork and beans
Excuse my manners if i make a scene
I ain't gonna wear the clothes that you like
I'm fine and dandy with the me inside
One look in the mirror and i'm tickled pink
I don't give a hoot about what you think

everyone likes to dance to a happy song
with a catchy chorus and beat so they can sing along
timbaland knows the way to reach the top of the charts
maybe if i work with him i can perfect the art

Imma do the things that i wanna do
I ain't got a thing to prove to you
I'll eat my candy with the pork and beans
Excuse my manners if i make a scene
I ain't gonna wear the clothes that you like
I'm fine and dandy with the me inside
one look in the mirror and i'm tickled pink
I don't give a hoot about what you think

no, i don't care
i don't care
i don't care
i don't care
i don't care
i don't care

Imma do the things that i wanna do
I ain't got a thing to prove to you
I'll eat my candy with the pork and beans
Excuse my manners if i make a scene
I ain't gonna wear the clothes that you like
I'm fine and dandy with the me inside
one look in the mirror and i'm tickled pink
I don't give a hoot about what you think

SONG TITLE: Pork & Beans

ARTISTE: Weezer

*It's a meaningful song to me. Somehow I can relate to this song. It reflects my life and tells me that I am in control of what I do and I am what I am, and nobody shall care about what I do and how I am, coz it's my own decision, my life. This shall be my current favorite track!! HEHE

2008-08-11T21:09:00.023+08:00

Hey peeps!

So on National Day, I was at home. I slept through the whole day coz the day before I tonned and I helped my family with the food stall as early as 6 am. By the time I woke up, it was already 9pm. Thankfully, my friends Andreas, Ruq & Sue wanted to meet up late to ton. So I met them at EHub at ard 11.30pm. Slacked at Mac at Downtown East. Then Ayeen & Fie came there too. Then we proceed to Seashell Park to meet the rest; Wan & etc. We played some stupid games haha but it was fun though. It was funny la. Some made silly jokes & etc. Everyone laughed. Came back home at 6am.

Woke up at night again on Sunday. Went out at 9 pm to meet Limited Edition. They were having practice at NP dome ( Tampines) for their Suntec Heats. So the practice was over by 10 pm. Others came too to visit us. Shikin, Hakim & Syam. We slack slack slack until at 1am, we decided to play this game called 'Ali Pom' ( did I spell correctly??). It was my 1st time playing that game like fucking serious. Kimak benci sak aku bila jadi the ''catcher''. Sume bully aku cibai! Mentang2 aku badan besar! LOL. We were having so much fun running, screaming, laughing till kampau datang. We probably made too much noice so some HDB residents who certainly have no life to actually bother to complaint about us. Semua ngah berpeluh siol and when being asked by the police why were we staying late at the dome and that we were perspiring, we told that we were having dance prac ( at 2am???LOL). Despite the police demanding us to leave the place asap, we did stay there until 6.30am.

So tomorrow got school and I better start going everyday. Received a warning letter by the school already. Fuck care ah...

& Good Luck to Limited Edition for the Suntec Heats this Saturday! Hope you all will do me and the group proud!! U guys gonna meletup aite?? HEHEHE.

Ok below are some of the pictures of LE taken on the Suntec Dance Audition and pics taken at Dome on Sunday.

LE on Suntec Dance Audition:

At NP Dome on Sunday

2008-08-04T18:40:00.003+08:00

1stly, HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO DEAREST FIE! Thanks for everything that you did for me and the others. We will treasure you lots!HEHE

2ndly, Congrats to LE for making it to the Suntec Dance Heats! All the best to Ame, Andreas, Fadz, Rok, Wan & zyk for the upcoming heats. Hope you all will do even better!

Lastly, I'm so over it about that thing (not gonna mention). I am really happy Im done with it. I used to be stuck in there only making my life harder and idiotic. Now, Im finally free. YOU know what? I don't give a shit anymore.

2008-07-28T00:30:00.006+08:00

Yesterday's HipRock Event was one of the best moments for me! I really had a great time dancing with LE. Despite ours as the last performance of the day, the crowd were still there and gave us the cheers! Actually I thought that this whole event would be boring because when we first reached there in the afternoon, the crowd wasn't that happening la but it turns out great during in the evening.

And these are the people I would like to thank and give them a few words. To zyk, Fie & Ayeen, thanks for giving me the moral support all these while and giving me faith and confidence in dance. To Wan, I really thought you did a great job yesterday.You really have improved tremendously in dancing and that is great. To Alif, thanks for the make-up yesterday (LOL). My face really look flawless! That is like WOW man. Thanks for your cheers too. To Susi, thanks for being our setia ''fan'', haha. Well what I meant is thanks for always coming down to support any of our dance when there is, gave us the support and help to take video our dance too!! To the rest of LE, thanks for being patient towards me during practice.LOL. Lastly but not the least, thanks Andreas for giving me the opportunity to dance for this HipRock event (despite giving me 3 songs out of 11!!!!). Still, I get to dance and have fun. So i guess thats all. If there is any pics, I will post it on the next post ya...

P.S And somehow, I finally feel fulfilled/satisfied bcoz I believe I did my best on stage yesterday. The feeling was great.

2008-07-25T13:00:00.005+08:00

I didn't went to school today. Woke up late. Tomorrow's the performance and I'm really scared and nervous, yet part of me tells me that I am really happy to be able to perform and just do my best. It will be a fun day tomorrow I guess. Get to meet other dance crews and our friends who will be coming to support us. Honestly, I'm feeling low right now coz I just feel that I'm not gonna be good on stage tomorrow yet thinking about zyk and fie with the words of encouragement they always gave me is really boosting my confidence. And I wanna shut some mother fuckers who think they're so good and they think can look down on others, especially people like me!! Ok I'm having practice later. I guess I gtg!

P.S You only need me when you need a replacement. I may be useless and unimportant, but I still have my pride. I don't want me to feel like I'm only being treated like a spare-tyre..

2008-07-19T15:38:00.005+08:00

Been going to school these past few days without missing any lessons or coming to lessons really late.It's for obvious reasons. Teacher called up my mum and tell her everything about me...that I've not been attending lessons (cabut la tu selalu) and yes had a big big big scolding from my mum. Now, my mum holds a copy of my school timetable given by my form teacher (thanks alot) so that means I couldn't lie to her that I finished school early or starts school late. Haha.

Anyway, it's good that I'm getting this treatment because I guess I have to start going to class and concentrate on my studies as my big exams are coming soon in September. And I really wanna go in to the 2nd year of Higher Nitec. FYI, Since I went to ITE CE, I've only came to school either once or twice a week. Maybe because I really find my lessons a bore and my classmates pathetic. But somehow, I kinda find my classmates ok, not bad actually and the lessons are quite interesting (some only). I think I'm slowly enjoying my life in ITE now.

And I can't wait for the 26th July Performance. Only a week left to practice. I really want us L.E to do super good on that performance. There'll be lots more good dance crews performing too and I really want us to be seen as up to standard with the rest of the crews,or if not, at least put up a good show on that day. Lastly, I wanna prove that I can do it too like the others regardless of my body!

Here are the pics of the week.

2008-07-15T00:50:00.007+08:00

Here are the pics from last Saturday's outing. Grabbed it from Wan's blog!! HAHAHA :P

2008-07-13T14:34:00.002+08:00

Just came back home. Well, yesterday's outing was ok except it wasnt really an L.E outing coz of some reasons. It's more of a reunion with Kx's, and I don't really mind that coz I really miss hanging out with them, hehe! The person who actually planned this whole LE outing thingy I don't know where he go, but yeah, me, Faruq, Fie, Ayeen, Wardah, Zu & Ili went to Hougang to ton at Wardah's house. Nothing really much happened but I enjoy it even though it was a simple outing coz I really love being with u guys. And to my good fren, thanks for always giving me the confidence and faith in what I love to do. Yesterday when you taught me some steps I really thought you were really patient coz I am really slow and instead of giving up, you push me harder and motivate me with your words. That means alot coz yeah all i really wanna do is to dance. And he's none other than Fie!! Hehe ur my motivator now. Not forgetting zyk too,you really help me alot too!! When I dance, I'll think of you both. You guys gave me the strength I need...

2008-07-07T01:16:00.002+08:00

Woke up late today at 4pm! I didn't went to celebrate my friend's birthday with the rest. Sorry guys! So just went to Mr Teh Tarik at Tampines earlier on for awhile to meet my friends there, Fie, Ayeen, Mel, Aimm & Zai. It's been a long time since I lepak there with my friends. I'm totally not prepared to go to school. Hate the part I have to wake up early at 6am!! That means 5 more hours before 6!!

Btw, I've been yearning to watch Hellboy 2 & Dark Knight so badly!! So friends..make urself free aites one of these days...go watch with me!!HAHA.

2008-07-06T02:25:00.007+08:00

Congrats to Fantastic Remix for making it to the 3rd position for the Jim Beam Dance Competition O8 yesterday!! So yesterday was a blast at the competition which was held at Double O. I really enjoyed dancing with my friends. The songs played by the dj was great fortunately on that night! I will get photos from Susi soon.

Btw, here are the pics which I promised to put it here for last Thursday's outing with my friends.

2008-07-04T07:02:00.002+08:00

Had fun yesterday at city hall. Well, it didn't turn out to be the way it was planned actually. I was supposed to play bowling with zyk, fadz & wan at Marina Square. But we ended up watching movie 'Hancock' at GV with our other frens, fara & hasif etc. They were at Marina Square too and so we decided to catch the movie with them. After that, we went drinking which was totally unexpected. For the 1st time, I tried vodka mixed with Amsterdam (Farhan's idea) and the taste was actually ok. It was quite smooth la. Reached Pasir Ris around 11pm. Then lepak at central until 6 am. And yeaps...I am just back from home. Gonna have busy weekends soon. Anyway will update pics we took at city hall. Gonna get photos from fadz & sam.

P.S I really love my frens. U guys make me happy always. I really enjoy spending time with u guys. And I really like my current companies zyk, fadz, wan & shikin. we've been going out 2gether lately and it's wonderful. Not forgetting my beloved dancemates esp. andreas, fie and ayeen! and to the rest of my frens..u guys r not forgotten. I came out with this topic bcoz simply I feel that I am enjoying my life slightly more these past few days/weekends. It's been a great time for me...so yeah thats all.

2008-07-02T19:30:00.003+08:00

Plans...

Thursday 03/07 : Bowling with zyk, Fadz, Shikin & Wan

Friday 04/07 : Jim Beam Dance Competion @ Double O bar.

Saturday 05/07 : To JB with family

Sunday 06/07 : Celebrating a friend's birthday

Monday 07/07 : School reopens! & this sucks!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

2008-06-28T22:45:00.000+08:00

Here are random pics from various outings I went out with my frens.

2008-06-28T19:19:00.008+08:00

Here are some of the photos we took at Gold Coast/Brisbane !! Have a good time looking !

PARADISE RESORT: We stayed here during the days in Gold Goast.

PARADISE COUNTRY FARM

WARNER BROS. MOVIE WORLD

SEA WORLD

OVERVIEW OF BRISBANE/GOLD COAST !

2008-06-20T13:08:00.003+08:00

I'm back in S'pore!! Miss my frens!! Met zyk, shikin & wan already. Hoping 2 meet the rest soon....

Gonna update pics taken in Austrialia soon!!There's like hundreds and hundreds of photos 2 upload!!!

2008-06-13T17:23:00.006+08:00

Going to leave home and head to the Changi Airport in 2 hours time (5.30pm right now). I am really happy that I get to go to Australia!! But I'm soooo gonna miss my frens here in Singapore!!

To zyk, fadz, shikin & wan, enjoy the holidays aite. Gonna miss hanging out with u guys. The laughters and all..I'm really gonna miss that! To Andreas, all the best for ur Jim Beam. I'm sorry I am probably not able to come down and support u for that dance comp. Anyway, it's great that u have the opportunity to dance with other great dancers. I think that's something for u rite? To Fie & Ayeen, it will be really long before I get to c u guys again. I am happy both of u are finally working.I'm gonna miss alot of our tonning and our lame jokes we made always!! HAHA. To Susi, maybe I can't even come to ur birthday pit too. Really gonna miss the enjoyment u guys gonna have there. So Happy Advanced 18th Birthday to Susi aite!! To the rest of my frens (too much to mention), gonna miss u guys too!

Ok la I know I will be in Australia only for 1 week although I talk like I'm gonna be there for 1 year!LOL But still, one day not meeting ur fren is like 10 days not meeting them! To me at least..

2008-06-10T15:33:00.007+08:00

Last Saturday was Dance Xplosion 3. It was fun watching great groups competing against each other. However, I just felt that SICK should be in the 1st place coz to me, their item really caught my eye and the contemp thing in the beginning was superb and overall, was humorous and entertaining & they, as a group were unique in some way! Freakzy Nuts were really good of coz but they seem to always give the same hip hop thingy, nothing really new to offer us,the audience. But their energy level was marvellous of coz & that is their advantage!

& to Limited Kx's, I can see you guys did ur best even though there were quite alot of mistakes. But at the end of the day, it's all about having fun in the stage as a group. I am still happy & proud of u guys that u guys did made it to the finals!!

Limited Kx's!

2008-06-09T12:07:00.006+08:00

These are the pictures during my time working with the Baby Looney Tunes!!

Shikin, Vega, Shao Tong.

Them again.

Baby Daffe & Baby Taz!! CUTE!

Tweety in Action!

And yeaps, there is no photo of me coz simply, I dislike taking any photos!Holiday is coming in a few days time & I'm going to Australia this coming Saturday!Gonna miss my frens here!

2008-06-04T15:34:00.003+08:00

Been going to school lately. No more frequent cabuts! Haha. I really need to concentrate on my studies. Slacked alot..missed lessons super alot. Now everything is rushing. Had to stay back in school for make up lessons etc. I really wana go to Polytechnic 1 day....

Congrats to Limited Kx's for making it to the finals! The finals will be on this coming Saturday at the open field beside White Sands Shopping Centre (Pasir Ris). Hope anyone reading this would come down to support the crew! The event starts at 7pm...

& I miss my Baby Looney Tunes job at Parkway Parade!! I miss the people I work with alot!! I have the photos I took during work...will post it soon ya....

2008-05-18T16:43:00.003+08:00

All the best to Limited KX's for their audition for Dance Xplosion.Hopefully u guys get through to the finals!! I am really glad that everyone did their very best for the audition. The dance was nice! If they really got into the finals, the event would take place in White Sands located at Pasir Ris. & that would be convenient for me to come over & support the group!!haha.

I really had enough of people coming to me & asking me these questions:

'' Why have you stop dancing?", " Why I don't see you dance anymore? " , '' Have you given up on dance? '' , ''When are you going to continue dancing again? ''

I am intimidated whenever they keep asking these questions. To the people who actually ask me those questions, don't get me wrong. Not that I'm angry or feeling hateful, it's just that I can get sensitive when such questions are being asked, especially about DANCE!!!! And i believe more than 10 people had ask such questions since I don't know when...soo ya, that's why I react to this way!

Actually, the answer to this ''multi-million dollar'' question is very simple. Truth is, I didn't have the chance to dance, not that I don't want to or that I am quitting.

2008-05-12T00:30:00.002+08:00

Been having sleepless nights. School's a drag for me!! Have to wake up early in the morning everyday.That totally sucks!

Yesterday was Danish's (my nephew) birthday. We had a party in our home. There were lots of people and my nephew's lucky coz he got a lot of presents!! How I wish I am still young! Like presents alot!! Then today went out with Ayeen,Fie & Syahril. Fie wanted to apply a job and I wanted to buy stuffs for my mum and aunt for Mother's Day. After that, went to meet my family to celebrate Mother's Day in a seafood restaurant. Had a sumptuous dinner!

I really love my friends & family. I feel that my life would be empty without you guys here with me...thanks for everything!!!!!!

2008-04-29T23:30:00.002+08:00

I'm soo gonna join the inter-school dance competition. 1st time, I'm asking myself to join something so badly. I really wanna dance once again. And although some might not agree into me joining this competition (so obvious by the look of it), I believe I have my own right to do what I want. Singapore is a democratic country, remember?? I know some of u look down on me coz 1stly, I'm fat. 2ndly, I don't dance well, 3rdly, I dont catch steps fast. But Im really trying right now to be able to catch steps fast. All these while I've been learning to do that and I think I can do better than last time. Try pulling me down as much as u want, coz I've changed the perception of wat people said about me. The more u criticise me, the more I try to prove you wrong. To all these people, Fi, zyk, shikin, sheedah, kapil, thanks for giving me hope and confidence for whatever I do,including dance. Especially to Fi and zyk I must say, you guys really help me alot to overcome my fear. I will really prove to people that I can do it good. So to the others who think ure super good and u think u can bring me down with ur actions and words, try harder next time!!!!!!! :)

And Im kinda enjoying school nowadays.

2008-04-20T15:08:00.002+08:00

School:

1st week of school was just okay. It was actually sucky at the starting but slowly it's kinda okay. Made some new friends in class. Well it's kinda bored actually la my class but have to get used to it!! Anyway school is for me to study so ya, all that matters is my studies. But still I love ITE CE coz I have alot of friends there from other classes!! Tomorrow I'm schooling. And I'm feeling slightly lazy already to go. Haha. But I must go la......

Dance:

All my dance mates have been busy with dance either for performances or competitions. Yeah, I'm the one just sitting around. And somehow, I have the big sudden feeling to dance once again! Maybe coz seeing them dance and all seems fun! And I felt like I already have a long long break and I am sick of coming to practice just sitting around watching them dance! Haha! Waiting for my turn to have MY practice too. Don't know when.....hopefully I'm not forgotten though.....................

Friends:

You have slowly become even more fucked up. What's with your attitude?? Thought you were a good fren but slowly you have been changing. Even your other frens are saying about you. Stop your bragging and all. Don't 4get who was the one who helps you become what you are right now. And your words can be really hurtful at times ar. Just watch out ar one day... what goes around comes around...

P.S Stop thinking your so good and mighty..coz seriously, you are nothing..

Family:

Fought with my mum last week. But now, everything's fine. Yeah I am sorry for what I have done lately..but all I need was YOUR trust....

2008-04-09T19:05:00.002+08:00

Monday, 7 April

Last Monday, went out with zyk, Muni & Wan. 1st we went to Aliwal St near Bugis to sign the contract for the job for Baby Looney tunes show which will begin on 23rd May at Parkway Parade. I really miss these kind of jobs a lot. However, instead of becoming the coordinator, now I'm working as the crowd control this time around. Zyk will be the only coordinator,which means the rest is the same as me.

After going to Aliwal St, we decided to just walk around at town area. We took a bus from Aliwal St and ended up in Tanjong Pagar!! Haha yeah we were idiots. So we did walk from Tanjong pagar to City Hall! It was tiring, especially to me and Muni! We are sensitive to the weather you see. We hate hot weather coz we will perspire easily and yet we hate windy weather too coz the wind will blow our lovely hair!!! Best would to be in an air-conditioned room for us.haha.

We took a break at Marina Square ( totally sick of this place already!). Accompanied zyk to Burger King as she wanted to eat. It was already almost to 7pm when we wanted to leave City Hall. Muni wanted to go to Sengkang to meet her baby Lan (her so-called guy) but at that point of time me & Wan wasn't sure whether we wanna accompany her to Sengkang coz we promised to meet Andreas, Ayeen & Fie in Tampines. But after much consideration, we decided to follow Muni coz she would be alone going to Sengkang and furthermore it's not always that we get to meet her too coz she has been busy with her work & etc. Went off back home at around 10 pm.

Later at around 2am, went to meet Fie & Ayeen near my house area. Then we sat under the block which is just opposite of my house. Fie bought a tub of Ben & Jerry for us to share! Woohoo I love ice cream a lot! And as a repayment, I cooked for them fried chicken ( Fie's fave chicken from me ) and chicken nuggets. At around 5 am, brought Fie & Ayeen to dome nearby my block for them to take a rest/nap. And guys, I'm sorry that I didnt bring you guys along to my house coz currently, my friends are restricted to come to my house due to some reasons. Hope u guys understand. And Fie, thanks alot for treating us for countless times. I feel thankful but at the same time, I feel really bad. I promised that if i got the money 1 day, I'll treat you too!!

Tuesday, 8 April

Get to meet Ayeen, Fie, Muni, Wan & zyk once again. This time around, there's Andreas too, whom I have not met for quite some time. Our intention is to go to Ite Simei to buy more uniforms there but upon reaching there, we were told that the uniforms were currently unavailable and so we proceeded to Expo (just opposite of Ite Simei) as Fie wanted to go to the John Little Sales. After that, went to Northpark dome. I followed the rest for their practice there. Miss that place. It's been some time we've not been there. Too much memories there. Be it a happy one or sad one. That dome was the 1st place I ever practice for a dance competition. HAHA. Ok they didnt practice much actually. All we did was talking and more talking. haha.

To zyk, I understand ur feelings. I have been through there before alot of times. They are like that at times. That is why I told you before sometimes you need to rely on your own. Don't depend on them too much. Even if you are struggling, I'll be trying my best to help you in every possible way! To the others, please, if you consider yourself as a group member, please help each other. zyk really needs help bcoz she's not been dancing for so long already. I wasn't happy how u guys taught her that day. It's like the heck-care attitude you guys are giving. I just wish for once, u guys wont only think of yourselves that much. And this does not include you, my dear leader. takmo terase tau! But ya, I hope u can talk to them abt how they should be helping the ones in need.

2008-04-06T06:14:00.002+08:00

Went to Seoul Garden at Ngee Ann City yesterday with my family to celebrate my brother-in-law's belated birthday. Had a feastful dinner. I ate quite a lot! But my sis told me that this is the 1st time i ate quite a little and slow for such a place. Haha maybe I'm slightly conscious about what I eat now, that's why. Don't wanna force myself to swallow all those food. 1st time eh I didn't take toilet breaks in between time to shit!! Haha. Usually I would shit 3-4 times when eating Seoul garden. U can ask my friends zyk & Fito! My cousin took photos for yesteday's celebration but I haven't receive the pictures yet. Gonna get it soon hopefully so that I can post it here. I realised that my blog is lacking of pictures which makes my blog looks boring and dull.

Speaking of me eating food slowly nowadays, that is a good thing! Read in a magazine that proves that chewing every morsel slowly saves you about 70 calories each meal. And do you know sleeping helps you to lose weight too??HAHA. It is said that a good night's rest helps burn your calories! Wow, huh? Ok I knew this from 8 days magazine my sis bought lah.

Ok, I can't sleep right now and it's early in the morning. Guess what I have been doing all this while? Yeah, searching for the type of mp3 I would like to buy! I could spent the whole night searching for the right mp3. What brand should I choose? Creative? Ipod? Samsung? I am really confused right now!

Step ada duit je untuk beli mp3. Thinking of borowing my mum's money 1st. Haven't ask her yet still!! Hopefully she'll lend the money to me. But looking at the situation currently... Hmmph..

2008-04-05T02:49:00.003+08:00

Really hope I would get that job in May. Really need the money. Going to Australia in June and my family ain't supplying me with the shopping expenses!! I'm in desperate to get that job, zyk!!

Months wasted going out everyday doing nothing beneficial. Could have spent the holidays working like what the others do. Instead, daily routines are to meet friends hanging out, wasting money on fast food, cigarettes and transport. Now my mum is pissed off coz everday I asked her for cash without even having the initiative to work while I can to earn some cash on my own. Yeah, I regret it alot right now. The pay could have gotten me a new mp3 which I totally need one, new branded shoe ( preferably an Adidas shoe) and new clothes!! Haha that's the real reason why I've been staying at home lately because I have no money to go out anymore. Mum won't give me cash. I understand why though. Whatever it is, school's gonna start soon.

P.S I fucking need an mp3!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Stress sia hidup without music!!

2008-04-04T02:55:00.005+08:00

Been at home lately. Trying my best to be a filial son at home, helping out my mum with her house chores and taking care of the toddlers. Miss my friends especially zyk & Fi.

Last week's (Friday) pit with my dance friends was quite okay. Did have fun with them. However, there were some unpleasant moments on the 2nd night of the pit. I was pissed and sad because of it. I really felt like going home at that point of time. Thankfully, there were Faruq, Sue & Susi who comforted and console me. I really owe it to you guys for making the situation better. In fact, I would say the pit would be meaningless if you guys weren't there coz it's like as if the rest were having their own thing, and we have our own thing. So kalau korang takde confirm aku will be mendak there. Third night (Sunday) was the best but it was the last day too. Was supposed to reach home on Sunday but me, Andreas, Ayeen, Fi, Mael & Aim end up going home on Monday.Haha. Yeaps, we went straight from East Coast to Tampines on the night we're supposed to be at home by right. We ton at Sunplaza dome. Hate that place because of the mosquitoes there!!!! To view pics of the pit, click here.

Planning to buy stuffs for school. School's gonna start real soon. Wonder how life would be in ITE Simei. I'm gonna buy new shoe, bag and jeans!!

And I'm trying my best to lose weight. And yes, I'm progressing! Gonna prove to you guys dat I can do so much better!! Waiting for that day when u gonna look at me, feeling envious and regretful for what you have said.

2008-03-28T08:43:00.002+08:00

I've been busy lately. Had lots of things going on!! I would like to congratulate once again to my fellow dance members for being the champion for Smack Dat Hip Hop Competition held on Saturday, 15th March. I am proud of you guys!!! To Andreas, you did a great job being the leader and choreographer! To Wan, you have improved your dance tremendously. To Sue, I am happy you did your thang! Told ya you could do it! Congratulations to X's Funk for being the 1st runner up!! Fi joget power ar!!

Be prepared peeps as my members, Limited Edition aka The-Exo (former name) are joining for Dance Xplosion on the coming June. Hopefully they can get through the audition. Wont get to support them probably as I will be in Australia with my family for a vacation. Still, all the best of luck ya!!

I gtg now. Meeting the dance people. We having a pit!! It's for celebrating their winning for Smack Dat. Ok I think I'm gonna be late!!!! Shit

P.S Will update pics soon....

2008-03-13T16:44:00.003+08:00

Dance. Now I really hate this word. So much things had happened recently and I just can't put them all in words here. All I gotta say is that I'm taking a long break for dancing. Had enough of fights, hatred and criticism. I guess it's about time I must stop dancing with my group. Dancing with you guys will only make me feel worse about myself. U guys always made fun of me, made jokes about me and all I did was to pretend that it was just a joke and I don't feel anything. Truth is, I am really hurt by the things u guys has said. I know, I'm fat and I'm slow in learning steps but I thought the reason of having a group is to help one another. But in this group, I don't really see that. U guys think more of urself than ur group members. Sometimes I really admire other groups. They are just so united. Their group is like a family, everyone is so close to each other and they all help each other too. The example would be Karmasutra. I really like their bonding between every member in the group.

Seriously, I owe to this friend of mine who is an experienced dancer for giving me confidence and faith for the Danceworks. In fact, thanks to him, I had kinda change my attitude. I've been less lazy in practice and etc. And my group did nothing to help me. I still remember eh the day where I wanted to change my attitude and want to be a better dancer, I kindly asked one of my group member to show me some steps I didnt knew cos I know I didnt concentrate when the steps were taught previously. What my group member said was, '' OH I thought you know the steps?? Learn yourself ar!'' Then my leader adds on. '' See, you only got urself to blame for not concentrating last time''. I was like GOSH, I am trying to change myself to be better and u guys dont even wana help me??? Eversince on that day, I realised that I only have myself to rely on.

And it's really sad that the ones who gave me the moral support to dance was no one in my group, but others from other group. The only one yang support me in my group pun is only Suhaila. They gave me advices and etc. and I'm really thankful coz I really need that after so much demoralizations from my very own group. And I hate it eh bila korang asyik cakap Suhaila gemuk, gemuk, gemuk. You are not helping her. You guys are just demoralizing her. I understand the feeling damn fucking well.

So I bet that you guys will be happy now that I'm not dancing. Lagipun, my existence in this group will hinder the group's progress kan?? This post is not a hatred post or anything. I just wana let my feelings out. U guys are still my frenss. All the best The-Exo!!! I will still be there to support u guys!

And to my leader, sorry that I'm ur biggest failure in the group.............

2007-08-24T08:24:00.000+08:00

Got a B3 for my Malay 'O' level.Well not that I'm dissappointed, but I really want an A1!!!So I'm retaking it..won't let the chance slip away! And now back to malay lessons.Haiz. At least I'm starting to concentrate during the lessons. Anyway, I was a lil disheartened when my malay teacher seems not to agree that I should retake the paper simply because she look down on me. Haha. Me & my sis we share this particular problem. We have a problem with our malay teachers. My sis told me back then, her malay teacher was biased against her and my sis got a C5 for her Malay 'O'!! The teacher actually made fun of her!! Thus, my sis wanted to retake her malay to prove her teacher wrong. And she actually asked my dad to write a letter to principal to excuse her from malay lessons because she can't stand the malay teacher!!Major problem...haha but at last she got an A1 for the retake!!! My sis is really my motivator la ar! But mine is just a minor la. It's just that my malay teacher can be sarcastic at times but I think she's better now.Alhamdullilah.

Yesterday was fun. Was supposed to go for SS Milestone test but end up cooking at Andreas' house with my other frens. It was great.Yuhaniz cooked the fried rice which was delicious! I fried the fries and chicken nuggets! We ate really alot. A sumptuous meal we had I guess.

2007-08-21T13:14:00.000+08:00

Been having tons of fun these past few days! Enjoy it to the maximum! Last Friday, went to try 'sisha'(correct spelling?) for the very 1st time at Arab St. Hmm it wasn't that great. So much for the hype.

Then next day went to City Hall with zyk & Andreas to catch the Suntec Dance at Suntec obviously. The dances by most of the groups were great. Masih teringin aku nak joget macam gitu..having my own group.LOL. In the evening, we planned to watch the fireworks at Marina Bay. Haha it's been damn long since I've catched the fireworks 'live'.It was cool to get the opportunity to watch those beautiful fireworks once again! But the place there was so damn fucking crowded & some of the people there were so damn annoying, plus alot of Jakon people!!! On my way home at Pasir Ris MRT, bumped into my friend and she passed me a pair of ladies' slipper which she found at Esplanade. Someone left it behind you see.The slippers were totally new with price tags on it! She also got herself a NUM shirt which costs like $50++!! I gave the slippers to my sis of coz.

Today is the audition. Hope we make it thru....all the best to ourselves!

2007-08-14T12:50:00.000+08:00

Been really bz these past few weeks. Had alot of fun actually hanging out with frens. Alot of stuffs happened.Good things of coz. Enjoy National Day with zyk, Andreas & Yuhaniz. It was great! Tiring day but alot of excitement!First time ever spending my National Day with frens! It was a wholesome experience. Then we had this small celebration.It was crazy but totally fun! HAHA doing bad things are fun sometimes. Anyway, last Saturday supposed to go Suntec to watch Andreas' solo dance but I had plans with my family which is to watch this malay folk musical at Victoria Theatre with my family and relatives. Hmm the play was so-so. But after the musical thingy, went seperate ways with my family and went out to some place with my cousins. Turns out to be a great night!!We had total fun. Gerek la.

Now I'm super waiting for my 'O' levels to be over man. Get done with it, have fun!Alot of things to do after that...REAL alot.....

2007-08-02T14:55:00.000+08:00

These past few days I have been hearing alot of stuffs about my good fren, zyk. I dont know who started this, but please don't make accuses about zyk. U guys don't know her well so don't act like u know much about her. Firstly, I have been hearing from some people in my class that zyk has changed this year, like she wasn't the same as last year. To the person who told the rest that zyk is blah blah blah, pleas watch your bloody mouth! To peeps out there, in case you don't know, I used to be close to this person. Yes, i trusted this particular person so much that I actually was neglecting my old fren, zyk.

I was totally influenced by this person. This person actually convinced me that zyk was bad and stuff and I actually buy all the things this person has said. I was stupid. Soon, I realise I was in this person's trap all this while. And this person has been telling aroung abt zyk and her behaviour. Ok if u are talking about zyk's attitude, she may look arrogant at 1st look and sounds annoying too, but then, if u really know her, then u'll think twice of what u thought she was. I think this is usual because we often judge a book by its cover besides knowing that someone inside out first.

Luckily, my other frens pointed me out that I was actually forgetting about zyk and I am guilty that I did leave her in the lurch at the beginning of this year. But this person again just started rumours again about zyk. so people, don't buy people's words that easily. And I'm dissappointed in this one particular fren because seriously, we thought u know what is the truth and what are the lies. zyk particularly thought she could trust you. But just a few rumours could jeopardise our relationship because u actually believe that person's words. And to that person, no matter what u do, I won't hate you but please stop bitching about other people's life...coz u'll be the one looking pathetic one day. don't forget ur the one who hurt her...leave her...and I can't believe I was ur accomplice...

P.S zyk I'm sorry about the past....but just to tell u, I will side with u now! To hell with those biatches!!!