Things Change. People Change.

Hey guys, finally I'm joining a comp. Its a Hip Hop Competition at Bukit Panjang Plaza. It's on 27th September. Hope any of you guys reading this will support my group, Limited Edition. Well this will probably be my last dance before I take a long break in dancing ( like I always do). I wanna said quit but you never know what is ahead of you so yeah. I am really getting sick of dance. Actually no, but getting sick of all the s*%$%@^%^ that I have to endure and be patient with. I think dancing for me is getting to nowhere.

I do enjoy it but I don't think I'm cut out to be a dancer. Always has been a sidekick in the group, always being just a lamp post to the group. No room for improvement. And I just hate the attitude in the group. I'm never looking forward to coming to practice. Listen to people bragging about themselves. Said things that could hurt my feelings. Do things that make me angry. I know I am a loser in here but I'm still a human, I got feelings, I got pride. I know they don't need me and I am pulling myself out, so no worries. I really am not interested on this dance thingy, period.

After 27, I'm all done!! Free like a bird. I'm gonna start working in my family stall, spend more times with my friends that give me all the love I need. It's going to be Hari Raya anyway so ya...it's all about having fun!!

And I have a new interest, which is cooking. Better do something that I can feel good about myself. It's about time I learn culinary skills from my mum, who has been a chef before. There's alot to learn and I'm gonna really learn. Mana tau, I could be a chef 1 day. Hehehe.

P.S I've been keeping it to myself all this while and It's about time I stand up for myself. You guys might not realise, but every little thing said or the actions did do hurt me in many ways. Am I just an object that can be used anytime you want, and when not in need, just being kept? Is it that oblivious to you guys? I want to change but I just can't. So I just give up....... I surrender!!

FAIZAL???!!! What happened to you???!!!

Today was a hectic and bad day for me!! My CMOS end-year exam started at 11am and guess what?? I woke up at 11am!! I rushed like crazy, took a cab. Run and run till I reached the function hall where I took my exam. Luckily I was still able to take the paper because I really do not know what to do if I were not able to take it. What would I tell to my mum and etc. ? Gosh and I was having a bloody good dream before I woke up!! I dreamt that my group, LE won 1st for a hip hop comp we took part!! LOL

I was sweating and panting in the function hall like a pathetic idiot. Never in my life had I been late for my exam before, never in my life I did not bath to go for a school's exam ( ya it happened today LOL)!

I realised that I have trouble waking up early these days and this is affecting my life. I don't know what is happening. I'm drifting apart with education and I spent less time with family. Sometimes I do wonder, have I changed alot for the worse??

Back in 2 years ago, I was a nerd in EVSS. I do not have much friends. I do not go and chill out with friends alot. My weekends are spent with my family. I always go home straight after school. My life seems boring during those days. Yet, it was great too because I was quite good in my studies. It makes my family happy, it makes me happy. At that point of time, all I wanted was my family to be happy. All I need in my life was them. All I wanted was a good education.

Then suddenly, 2007 came. Slowly and slowly, I started going home late. Started losing focus on studies. Started asking mom for more money. Started going out every weekends. Less time on studies and family, spent more time with my friends. At that point of time, I felt really really happy. Finally I'm having the time of my life; having lots of friends to hang out with, do things with them.

Now I realised how I am drifting apart with my family. Now I realised how my perception is about studies. Lately, I've been thinking not to school coz it's no use. I'm too lazy to study etc. I don't know what has become of me. Why do I think this way?? I used to be determined, I used to be slightly more hardworking. I am confused. I am happy with my life now coz I got freedom, I can do anything I want yet what this supposed to be my freedom gets worse and its taking over me. It makes me feel that I should enjoy enjoy and enjoy and not to think of studies etc.

I'm STRESS!!!!!!

Can you believe it???

I went jogging today!! Haha.yeap its true. I met up with my friends at 3am then we went to jog from Pasir Ris to Tampines Northpark!! When we reached Tamp, we met up 2 other people then work out at the Northpark fitness corner. LOL.We end our 'exercise' thingy at 5am. Then we proceed to a friend's house nearby and sahur there. After that, went to a block and the rest played cards while I just look and blah blah blah. Ended up reaching home at 8am! And now I can't sleep. If I were to sleep, I'll probably wake up late and not be able to meet my friends on time which is at 2pm!

I really wanna lose weight and I am having the mood for it! Less eat, more exercise! Diet diet here I come!!

Ok. It's fasting month!! Been fasting....that's good for me. So my usual activity is to meet my friends after buka to study/lepak together till sahur. After that go home, then sleep. then wake up in the afternoon, then the cycle goes on. I can't wait till this Wednesday. Once my exams are over, time to enjoy even more without thinking about studies!!LOL. Baru leh buka dgn kawan2....gi geylang...gi shopping etc.

So below are the 5 things that I wanna buy before Hari Raya:

1) A grey baju kurung

2)A new branded shoe ( Nike or DC)

3) New clothes

4)New pants

5)Perfume (Hugo or CK)

Last Friday went to Baybeats with a bunch of friends. We reached at Esplanade around evening. Well, honestly speaking, I have realised now how much I am not interested with rock/live bands haha but still I do enjoy some rock bands or tracks if they're really good. So after Baybeats, went to Marina Square to celebrate Faruq's birthday. It was fun. It was sweet. If only my birthday happened the same way.HEHEHE. So Faruq and Andreas end up tonning at my house...and I'm lazy to type what happened on my weekends but all I did was purely lepaking with my friends at Pasir Ris. And now its fasting month. Soon it will be Hari Raya. I'm gonna be happy for quite some time!! But wait, I got my final exam this year! Erm next week actually!

And my blog runs out of pictures again. Soon soon maybe...